No Second Chances
by Hari-Deity
Summary: Madelyn Williams is having a rough life. She can't help but think about ending it. She's always forgotten, and never appriciated. Her world soon turns upside down when someone notices AND remembers her. T for suicidal themes, warnings inside.
1. Stop!

**A/N: Hm, I think I'll do a no-nonsense author's note.**

**Well, here are the warnings: Fem!Canada, suicidal themes, cursing on occasion, sexual themes (it's high school, what do you expect?), OC's, human names (naming chart is on my profile), bending of human laws (Kumajiro is a legal pet), and some bending of Hetalia itself (Kumajiro is a boy...).**

**Oh! This first chapter is just a starter. The others will be longer, I guarantee.**

**Uh, that's all?**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Hetalia, nor will I ever. Neither do I own any franchise or propaganda referenced in this fic, even if you've never heard of it before, I don't own it.**

**Please review!**

I sighed as I sat at the edge of my bed. Nobody remembered me anyway, why should I worry. Aurthur told me it'd be painless. But he was still alive, so what would he know about death? Well, I guess black magic did help with his knowledge on everything creepy.

I shook my head and sighed. This wasn't going to happen if I just sat there and stared at the room.

It was surgically clean, like those rooms in magazines. I had organized everything so no one would have to go through the trouble of cleaning the place. My hockey gear was on one wall, next to the Canadian flag. My school books were all organized, as well as the other things on my desk. I stared at my closet next. I saw the dress mom bought me the week before. It was beautiful. Light powder blue and a little lace on the edges.

Should I die in it? No, it was too pretty to be soiled with all that blood. And didn't Arthur say you forever live in the clothes you die in? I think I'd like to be comfortable when I died.

I stood from the bed and looked through the closet to find what I was looking for. I was only wearing a towel because I'd taken a shower before I'd sat down on my bed. That was hours ago though. I sighed as I picked up my hoodie with a maple leaf on it. I tugged that over my bra, and I tugged a pair of baggy jeans over my boxers. I placed the towel in the bin I had in the closet for dirty clothes. I checked my pockets for anything valuable and found nothing. Good. I didn't want a pick pocket to steal from the sleeping girl in the river.

The next step in my routine was to look over to my desk. I stared down at my phone wallet, and all the things I didn't need. The only thing I did was grab the thread of leather with five beads on it and tie it around my neck. Mom gave it to me when I was little, when I didn't want to trust her. She said it would protect me from harm, that her tribe made each bead and blessed it. Ironic really, that I tied it around my neck before I jump from a bridge. Looks like it wouldn't provide the protection she wanted it to.

I glanced in the mirror. The barrettes that kept the hair out of my face were on the desk, letting my overgrown bangs hang in front of my eyes. I tucked them behind my ear and pulled my pigtails into my hoodie. Should I wear my glasses? Will they get crushed when I fall? I won't be able to make my way to the bridge if I couldn't see a foot in front of my face. When I'm dead, will I have better vision? Legally blind is something as horrible as blind itself.

I adjusted my glasses, deciding to keep them on before slowly creeping out the door. I walked down the stairs from my attic room, down another set of stairs, and through the hall on the first level of my house, passing Mom's room. I heard her soft radio playing but I also heard her snores. I guess being a single mother of adopted twins was more than she could handle. I thought about poking my head in and saying goodbye, but I turned my stony face down the hall. The clock on the wall read 2:35. It wasn't surprising that when I passed Alfred's room next to the kitchen, I heard his loud snoring.

This time, I slipped in and stepped to his bed. My steps were silent, as they always are, so he didn't stir. I sighed and stroked his hair, like a mother. I always was mothering to him, even if he was older. He was more protective than a mother bear when he wanted to be. I chuckled at the thought and looked down at him. I fiddled with the small bracelet on his wrist that matched mine. We made them in the first grade, all those years ago. I sighed again and crouched down.

"Good bye Alfred." I whispered softly. I kissed his forehead like a mother would and stood up before leaving the room.

The door closed behind me and I sighed. Turning back wasn't allowed anymore. I'd gotten this far to many times before and stopped. It wasn't worth it to keep going on with normal life now. I just passed finals, the school year was practically over, I wouldn't be missed. Mom would be to busy with work to notice my absence, Al has his friends, and coach wouldn't need me until December, and by that time, he would have forgotten me. I didn't even have friends that would miss me.

While I was thinking, I'd already passed my door, and closed it softly. I walked through the yard quickly, ignoring our car. I didn't know how to drive it anyway.

As I walked through the deserted streets, I started remembering everything from when I was a kid. Things that didn't matter, things I hadn't thought about in years.

I remembered a day when I was still a baby. My real Mom and Dad were yelling in the next room. Neither me nor my brother understood their words, but we knew the faces, even when we couldn't see them. They were angry. So angry...

The next thing I remembered was when I was three. I was with my real mom. This was after Mom and Dad broke apart. This was when Alfred wasn't living with me. Mom had another baby, his name was Ian. Ian's daddy was a really big guy. One day mom was out, and Ian was crying. Ian's daddy didn't like crying, so he shook Ian. Ian got really messed up, and he never got better again.

The next one was when I was eight. I broke my arm when I was playing with Ian. It hurt so much. I wished Alfred was with me, but that wish wasn't fulfilled. I got a cast on it. Nobody at school wanted to sign it, but Ian drew me things, like polar bears and maple leafs. He even was able to write his name a few times. Mom was really proud of him.

I was eleven. Ian was with Mom's sister. Mom was driving me to hockey practice when it happened. We crashed. The last thing I remembered was seeing her smiling face when I made a joke about Dad and Alfred. I looked ahead and saw two bright lights through the windshield. They were yellow. Like a light bulb in a dining room or a street light gives out yellow light as opposed to the white light florescent lights give off. I was knocked out of the car, shattering both my legs. I got a lot of scars and hurt, but mom was stuck in the car when it tipped off the side of the road. The man driving the truck called the medical staff and I was brought to the hospital. Dad had to fly up to Halifax, Nova Scotia, all the way from Seattle. It was one of the only times I'd seen Alfred. Dad said I'd be living with them until I could leave, just like Al. I didn't see Ian after that. I only got letters.

It was only a year after. I was 12, and out of the wheelchair I'd been in after the crash. Dad told me and Alfred to stay in the loft while he went to the store. We were out of eggs. He didn't come back from the snow storm. The next morning when me and Alfred were watching the news, they were talking about a murder. It was Dad. He had the eggs we needed and maple syrup. He got it for me, but he never got home for me to thank him.

Half a year after Dad died, we were taken out of the foster homes system. A nice Native American Woman adopted us. Her name was Shikoba Harjo. She said she was Cherokee. She was my new mom. She took care of us and enrolled us in a good school. To bad she soon took a favorite. I was ignored quickly and I stopped believing she loved me like her own child.

I shook my head swiftly and saw my journey was over. I walked through the suburban area while I thought. I was already in the town center, so close to the river. I guess that was my life flashing before my eyes. That was fast, but I guess only the important things get in your slide show of your life.

I sighed as I walked along the cement infront of a few stores. A chocolate shop, a shoe store, a gym, a bakery. At the window of the bakery I stopped. I looked down at the cakes and pastries. Where I was going, would they have those? They looked delicious. I tucked my bangs behind my ear again, as they fell in front of my eyes. I straitened up and looked through the window. I thought I saw someone in the darkness of the back of the shop, a hallway or a set of stairs even, but I knew it wasn't what I thought because the faint outline of the person vanished.

If that was a person, would they have stopped me if they knew what I was doing? I quickly chased that thought out of my head and turned to walk down the street. That wasn't a person, it was my imagination. If it was, they didn't even see me. Nobody ever saw me. My mind was playing tricks on me.

I walked down the street, not hurrying nor lagging behind the pace of imaginary people I envisioned walking down the familiar streets. I sighed as I passed the college the town was built around. The one Mom- no- Shikoba wanted me and Alfred to go to. It wasn't extremely special, but it had a reputation for funny teachers and easy school life. The swallows after that point on were dry, because I found myself actually getting nervous about what I was going to be doing next.

The pet store, the Sunflower Market, the family owned stores of the town all passed me as I walked to the bridge. It was in sight. The black and gray metal didn't have much fence, so it would be easy to jump from. Before I knew it, I had two fists clenched around the metal and a boot in a link of the fence. I was at the top of the fence. I sat there, not because I didn't want to jump, but to look at what surrounded me.

The moon shone on my face and the bridge was strangely void of all cars. It was 3:00 by now. I saw the clouds start to crowd the moon light, giving it a haunted look. The pine forest in the distance framed the slowly clouding sky. I adjusted my glasses again and felt something strange. Tears.

Tears were pouring down my cheeks. It was the first time in a while. I didn't start crying when I left the house, not when I remembered everything, but when I saw the scene of the moon and the river and the forest and the clouds. I closed my eyes to listen to the river below. It smelled lovely, like water in the mountains. It was beautiful. It almost made me want to clamber down from the fence and walk home. Almost. As soon as the moment of bliss was gone, I felt that strange empty feeling again. I didn't deserve to be alive. Nobody wanted me there. It was going to be over.

I felt my hands grip tighter onto the fence as I sat there.

"_Hey!"_

They were getting ready to throw me off.

"_Hey you!"_

It was going to stop. I would be in peace.

"_Girl! What are you doing?"_

No one was stopping me, so now I will leave.

"_Get down from there!"_

My arms pushed me forward.

"_You could fall!"_

I smiled at the feeling of being weightless. It was beautiful.

_"STOP!"_

I did it. I was falling. But something was wrong. Very wrong. Something was dragging on my sleeve. I didn't want to open my eyes to see something horrible to replace the beautiful sight of the sky and the moon, but I had to. I was still falling, but I opened my eyes to see a hand sticking out of the fence. My arm had only just slipped out of it's grasp.

As I was falling fast, I looked up at the person that belonged to the hand. I could only see one thing.

Such piercing, pleading, red-orange eyes.

Then it turned to black.

* * *

><p>My eyes flicked open to see the sunlight pouring through the windows of my room. I stared at the ceiling and felt my fists ball up in the blankets. I couldn't believe it was just a dream. Only a dream...<p>

I must have been sleepwalking. I was wearing everything from my dream, even the leather and bead necklace.

"I guess dreams foreshadow life." I said darkly and sat up.

Another day of hell I would sit through, I guess.


	2. Who?

**A/N: H-holy- I have reviews?**

**Sorry about that. I don't expect people to like my stories... Well, uh, thanks? Um, I don't have much to say.**

**Oh! I noticed how no one cares about Ian... he's Nova Scotia, just so everyone remembers... poor baby...**

**Also, Male!Netherlands name is different in this. Princess of preposterous hates Johan, and she made me change his name to Jasper. Complain one more time and I'll fly over there and murder you, Lotte! Just kidding... I wouldn't kill you.**

**Please review!**

A month. That's how long I had to wait for something to change.

I woke up every morning the same way as before. It was almost painful even. I tried to do it, but it didn't work. I even succeeded! But that isn't something that matters. It was only a dream, and I still had to wake up with the faint horizontal scars on my thighs every morning and ignore the box of razors buried in a pile of old homework. The scars were easily hidden by scars from the crash. Open fractures and glass and stitches camouflaged the fading razor scars. They were practically invisible, well, not to me, but to everyone else. I wasn't worth seeing or remembering, so they didn't notice abnormal scars.

My eyes flashed open as usual, seeing the ceiling. I looked over to see Kumajiro sleeping curled up on the pillow. He was panting in his sleep. I sighed at him and pulled him into my arms. His eyes opened lazily and looked up at me. I couldn't help but smile back down at him. He was like a child to me.

I lumbered down the steps to the bathroom and plunked Kuma down in the tub. I turned the cold water on and plugged the tub. I dashed back down the stairs to grab one of the huge bags of ice.

"Maddie!" Alfred said as I was about to leave the kitchen. "I didn't hear you wake up!"

"Al, why are you awake?" I asked as I stared at the clock that read 7:00. "You don't get up until 14:00 or later." I said and shifted the ice in my arms. "Can I go, I need to get the ice up to Kumajiro." I said and watched him sigh. He waved his hand and let me trudge up the steps.

When I was up stairs, I stopped the water and started to slash open the top of the bag.

I giggled at the thought of that being me, skin as the plastic of the bag. It would be entertaining, seeing my blood splatter like water across the walls of a bathroom. Kuma looked up at me like I was insane. He reached up and pawed me across the face. Mom got his claws removed when we got him a few months ago. I poured the ice in, playing with it a bit so it would break up and cool off the water. When I was done, I sat there, cross legged and played with him. He was like a baby. One of the only things that kept me from finding that bridge and jumping off it was this little guy. I didn't want to think what would happen if I was gone. Well, it'd happen some day, hopefully soon.

"MADDIE!" I heard Alfred shout and storm up the steps. "Mom's home early!" He said with an excited expression.

"There's chores." I said and let Kuma play-maul my arm. He tackled it and tried to pull me into the water with him. "We better just ask her what we're going to do." He looked at the floor and nodded He turned out of the room and I sighed. Mom never remembered me, so she never really had me do anything. Most kids would be happy, but any acknowledgement from my mother was something treasured by me.

It was a while before I sighed and pulled Kumajiro out of the tub and walked downstairs, drying him off. I silently sat down at the table next to Alfred.

"Madelyn! I-"

"Yes, you forgot. I know. It's fine." I muttered and stroked the still damp bear in my lap. "What do you want me to do?" I asked and watched her sigh. I was a burden to talk to, that's what. She didn't want me anymore. When _did_ she want me? She always liked Alfred so much more.

"I was going to ask you to go into town and buy a cake for your brother's birthday." She said with a smile.

That's always the sign that she forgets. Our birthdays were different, I was two minutes younger than him, and in the next day even, so we celebrated on separate days, but mom always forgot my birthday, no matter what. She was so centered on Alfred's she didn't want to celebrate mine.

"Yeah." I said weakly and stood up. I walked up the stairs to put jeans on and to place Kuma in the tub again. When I got up to my room, I brushed my hair because I didn't do it that morning. I let it fall on my back in pigtails before pulling a messenger bag over my head and pulled flip flops on before I trudged out of my house. I walked through the streets quickly in the heat in the summer. It wasn't something I liked at all. I just wanted to get into the town and into somewhere with air conditioning.

It didn't take long for me to be in the streets of the college town again. I shuddered at the sight of the crowded streets. I hadn't been there for so long. Not since before my dream had I been there. It gave me an unnerved feeling. I felt as if I would just disappear as I always did. Nobody noticed me. _Nobody_.

I shook my head as I approached a few cafés. I wasn't until I looked through a bakery window that I had a crazy flashback. I remembered seeing a figure of someone in perfect detail. It already happened. The memory was in such detail, it was giving me a headache. I tried to ignore the throbbing image, but it wouldn't stop until someone crashed into me. He had red hair and green eyes, but he didn't look at me. He brushed himself off and walked quickly away without any notice of me.

I picked myself up and walked in the bakery's doors. The smell of delicious food hit me and I remembered when I was little when Mom took me and Al here. I breathed in the scent and smiled. I remembered it.

I bent down to look at a set of cakes in the display counter. They were cute.

**ЖЖЖJASPER'S POVЖЖЖ**

I groaned as I rolled over. The morning crowd of people downstairs woke me before my alarm got to it. I picked myself off the floor I rolled onto, not caring that my hair was messed up passed normal. I wanted to go downstairs, but dad would be angry passed belief and that would just be... _perfect_. Sarcasm is a beautiful thing, isn't it?

I walked into my bathroom and washed my face, staring at dark circles under my eyes. I hadn't slept well since that night. It felt like a dream, but I distinctly remember waking up and going to sleep. And I couldn't stop seeing the girl's eyes out of my head. They looked like they blamed me for something.

I shuddered and ran my hands through my half-gelled hair. I rummaged through the cupboards to find it, but I gave up after a few minutes. I pulled on pants and walked down to the shop, tired. Dad would have just called me down anyway.

I stared at the customers, all buzzing about for the American national holiday. Fourth of July or something. It was a bit annoying since this college town was barely American at all. Most of the people were from Europe or Asia, not America.

I sighed as I helped some obviously stupid customers. "_No, this will not help you loose weight_.", "_Yes, I can customize a cake for you, but there is a three day wait_.", and "_Just because America's national day is in three days,doesn't mean the entire world even remotely cares_." Are common answers I've been trained to give.

I sighed as another customer walked away and looked up. Then my heart nearly stopped.

There.

She.

Was.

_Holy crap_.

I swallowed hard as I stared at the girl walk in the door. She was just knocked to the ground outside, as her hair was a little off. I couldn't move as I stared at her walk around lazily. She examined the pastries in the counter, ones I decorated. I blinked quickly, not believing my eyes.

The instants my eyes were closed, I saw the body being washed down the river, mangled face, torn maple leaf hoodie, haggard jeans, even the boot left in the fence.

I sighed and calmed myself. It was merely a dream. She probably only looks like the girl. I mean, it's not like she could have the deep violet eyes. Those were just... uncommon. No, impossible. I just dreamed it up! Yes, just a dream-

_Shit._

She looked up.

The eyes... they were the exact same purple.

I let my eyes fall upon another customer for a second or two so she wouldn't see me staring, when I looked back, she was looking at the counter again. I couldn't help but walk over slowly. I could feel my mouth forming the words "Aren't you dead?" but that was rude, so my mind just pulled at nothing.

"Happy Canada Day." I said and she jumped up to look at me. Canada Day? Really? You're making up a greeting on the fact in a dream where she was wearing an obviously Canadian hoodie. It's not even possible you dunce!

"How do you know I'm Canadian?" She asked, wary.

Her voice. It was so soft, I could barely hear it above the chatter in the shop. I blinked like an idiot as I stared into her purple eyes. They were the exact same as my dream, which made me wonder if it was a dream. She had a few freckles on her cheeks, mixed with a blush that made her absolutely adorable. Her hair was hanging in front of her eye and I wanted to brush it out of her face, but my arms wouldn't move.

I realized she asked me a question and I tried to speak. Something about how Canada was amazing and it's freedom from the British deserved to be celebrated sprang to mind, but all that didn't come out of my mouth.

"Uh..."

Crap.

Why does the universe hate me?

She stared for longer and I couldn't say anything. My mouth wouldn't keep up with my head and noting would come out.

"Jasper." I felt a hand on my shoulder, pulling me back. I finally got the strength to look at the owner of the hand. My father. "Don't you have cakes to finish?" He asked and practically saved me. I nodded and walked back into the kitchen.

I breathed heavily, not believing my memory.

Holy mother of god, what the hell just happened?

I pulled out a particularly difficult cake from the fridge and continued to decorate it, to distract me, and so I wouldn't look like I was staring off into space like an idiot, quote of my father, by the way.

She was there. She had the same eyes, the same face, the same everything. I saw her die! There was no way I just imagined that though. And it couldn't have been a dream. It wasn't as if I could have mistaken that face. I saw it shred on the bridge! Even her hair was the same. The same massed up pigtails. I couldn't get my thoughts strait at all.

"Jas!" I looked up to see dad looking at me. I looked back down at my work and grunted in response, telling him he could continue. When he didn't, I looked back up. He was looking at the wall with a confused expression.

"Dad?" I asked and waved my hand in front of his face. "You in there?" He looked back at me with a blank expression.

"Why am I out here?" He asked faintly.

"Uh... you took an order from that blonde girl in here. Violet eyes, freckles." I said and he stared at me, this time not knowing what the hell I was saying.

"Who?"

"Come on dad. The Canadian girl that you just pulled me from."

"Jas, what are you talking about? I haven't seen a blonde girl all day." He said and this time I stared. He was just talking to her! How did he not remember her?

I looked down at his hand that had a piece of paper scrunched in it. I pulled it from his loose fist and looked at it shortly. It was an order note. I looked at he signature. It was small and illegible, but it started with an "M". It was a cake for a birthday.

"I'll take this order." I said and he looked at it like it appeared from thin air.

"Where did-" He stopped himself before he could say more. "You, Bella, and Henri can run the store. I'm going to sleep." He said and rubbed his head.

I watched him walk up the stairs to our apartment above the shop and blinked.

_The hell just happened?_


	3. Dark Skies

**A/N: I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry.**

**Whoever is still reading this, I'm deadly sorry, no joke. I can't remember how long since I've written in this, and I'm so freaking sorry about not updating or writing or anything. Everything has just been really messy in my life, and, there have been hospital visits, boyfriend troubles, family fighting, family hate, and all around drama. As well as some summer homework.**

**If you have listened to all my excuses, here. Have some chapter related stuff. And, also some writing. I know! It's been unheard of for months now! But it's there!**

**Well, this chapter is set a month or two after the last one, a month into school. It's also in our poor Maddie's POV. Later in the chapter, it will go to David's (Ecuador's) POV, so don't be discouraged.**

**And I forgot a couple warnings in the first chapter: Blood, lots of it, and references to SI (Self injuring for the people that don't know), as well as graphic descriptions of the SI process in later chapters.**

**Well, this will be a long chapter to make up for the months lost. Enjoy!**

I tugged my hoodie over my head and yawned again. Six in the morning. Not exactly enjoyable to say the least. I rubbed my face and looked into the mirror. I looked like crap, as usual. I hobbled over to the mirror and brushed my hair. It never got too tangled, strangely enough. I shrugged and tied it back. I stuck the triangle barrettes in my hair and sighed. I felt Kumajiro nuzzle my leg and looked down at him. He wasn't too hot, but he still needed to have his medication.

I placed him on my desk and rummaged past _my_ meds and found the yellow liquid that I knew was his. I opened his mouth and poured the liquid in. He was still tired, so he didn't care. I placed him on my bed before moving to the door and stumbling down the stairs. I looked into Mom's room and saw she wasn't there. It wasn't something I was expecting as I walked to the kitchen. Al was laying face-first on the table.

I chuckled and stroked his hair. He instantly jumped off the table and looked at me with tired eyes.

"Matt..." He said with a groan. "Food..."

"Fine." I said and took out ingredients for pancakes. "And stop calling me Matt. I'm not one of your idiot friends." I was referring to that Danish one named Mathias, even though he was my friend too. I sighed as I watched Kumajiro walk through the door. I pulled some of his food from the fridge and placed it in his bowl. I sighed and continued to make the pancakes.

When I was done, I placed the food in front of my brother. He instantly jumped up and started inhaling it, as I behaved like a human being while eating.

"So, Maddie." He said and swallowed the rest of the milk in his glass. "Are you dating David yet?" He asked with a smirk. He was talking about my best friend, David. He was from Ecuador. I simply looked over at Al with a frown. "I'll take that as a no." He said and looked down at the table, letting me finish eating.

David was an interesting boy. I couldn't sort out what I felt for him. I knew him since we moved out here, as he was the first person to talk to me. To notice me, really. He had a horrible past as well, so he could relate to how my life went. I guess I "liked" him, but that wasn't returned, right?

I shook my head as I finished my breakfast. I picked up everything and placed it in the sink. I flattened my uniform skirt and walked to the door to put on my shoes and grab my bag. Al followed after and did the same before we both walked out. I locked the door and tossed him the keys so he could drive. It wasn't long before we were off.

I stared out the window and saw it was drizzling again. There was that one stuck up girl that compared this town to that one place in that one crappy book, Twilight, was it called? I rolled my eyes at that statement and stared yet again. The world wasn't made of sparkley vampires and stupid plots that no one liked anyway. Girls were to encompassed by love stories that made no sense, nowadays. They had this perfect world to live in, a dream to fulfill. I scoffed at that and stared at the sky.

"Maddie." I jumped at my brother saying my name in the silent car.

"Yes?"

"Are you happy?" He asked, looking at the road solemnly. "I mean, do you like this life?"

"What makes you ask that?" I asked, looking at him curiously. He sighed and pushed down his sleeve. The bracelet was hanging there. It was one of those few times when we got to see each other when Mom and Dad were divorced. It wasn't even fraying, he took such good care of it.

"You've just seemed so sad..." He whispered and looked around. "Like, you aren't talking with anyone, you barely have friends over anymore. All you do is walk up stairs and sulk." He said and I chuckled.

"David has his sister to deal with, Ivan supposedly got someone pregnant, and you're always doing something." I said, not believing the rumor about Ivan. It explained why he wasn't at school, but I still highly doubted it.

"Oh..." Al sighed.

"Did mom tell you to ask?" I asked and he rolled his eyes.

"Of course not. That's absurd-"

"Absurd isn't in your vocabulary. Mom told you to say that too. I know a lie when I hear it." I snapped at him. We were silent for a few moment before I sighed. "I'm sorry..." I said quietly. Damn my politeness. I had to say sorry every time my voice got louder than a whisper in anger or something of the like.

We were silent again and my gaze floated to the sky. It was almost like that night... that _dream_. I had to tell myself it was a dream every day now. It was getting harder and harder to believe. Mom seemed to forget me whenever I left the room, and teachers always asked if Madelyn was a new student. Apparently they'd never seen my ID before. Kids were even ignoring me... When they were asked to pass things out, they'd always skip me. I guess they couldn't see the small person in the chair.

I sighed again and scratched the cuts in my leg. I had to start it again. Life was getting to hard to deal with, so I started my nasty Foster Home habit of injuring myself. Al didn't know, and neither did Mom. I bought the bandages and razors on my own, or stole them. Invisibility would always make the second method easier.

"Maddie." Alfred's voice ripped me from my thoughts and I focused on the surroundings. Fairview-ridge Union of Knowledge. My high school.

I pulled myself from the car and brushed myself off. I shrugged my bag onto my shoulder and walked quickly away from the car. I didn't want any more of Mom's questions.

People didn't notice me as I walked through the front door, they never did. Kids were milling about on the front hall, commons, and even the cafeteria on the second floor. I made my way through the school and into the library.

Silence greeted me as I pulled out my small notebook and pen. I stared at the page and sighed. I turned to the flip-side on the page and started sketching nothing in particular. School wouldn't start for another 20 minutes, so I had time.

My mind floated to that night... that dream... it haunted me... the streets I walked were ones I tried to avoid. I only ever thought of that night. I looked down at the sketch and jumped. The orange eyes from the dream jumped out at me. I didn't notice my hand grabbed an orange pen and colored it in while I was thinking.

Suddenly my head pounded and a vivid image of that boy's face pulsed in front of my eyes that were clamped shut from the pain. I pressed my palms hard over my ears because the sound of even the air drifting past, and the sound of someone turning a page in the background hurt too much.

"MADDIE!"

The feeling of being nearly tackled to the ground made the pain disappear. I looked up to see two of the albinos that attended the school.

"Hi Gilbert... hi James..." I muttered and was pulled up by both.

"Maddie! Why do you have to be so down?" Gilbert asked and I shrugged. I saw James being himself, quiet and concentrated, and waved. He nodded back and continued to mess with his white hair.

"I'm tired." I muttered and ran my hand through my hair. "And do we have practice today?"

"Yeah. Coach wanted all of us after school today." He said and patted my shoulder. I nodded and gathered my things.

"We should get to class." I heard James' low voice say and nodded. I walked from the room without saying goodbye to my two team members. Hockey was the best sport in my opinion, but sadly there was barely anybody on the team. Not many people wanted to play such a dangerous sport I suppose. Gilbert already had partial bottom dentures from how many teeth he'd lost. I giggled at that thought and found myself at my locker.

Soon, my books were in my hands and I was off to my first class, algebra... _joy_.

Sarcasm's lovely, isn't it?

**ΞΞΞTIMESKIPΞΞΞ**

I sat, my head lolling to the ceiling. I watched patterns flicker over it, from the glare of the projector screen in the front of the class room. World History was horribly boring. The Indus Valley Civilization was boring. I was only really excited for the later histories, but I would have to wait.

My head rolled around on my neck to look down at my phone that had just vibrated. I opened it and read the text. It was from my friend, David. I looked up at him, who was across the room, but staring directly at me. I furrowed my brow in confusion and looked back down at my phone.

"_Your neck looks broken when you swivel your head around like that. Doesn't it hurt?"_

I cocked my head to the side and a smile perked onto my face. It was a while since that happened. I proceeded to type back an insult along the lines of "Your face looks funny. Doesn't it hurt when you look in a mirror?"

I saw him scowl at me after I watched him read the message, making me chuckle. He shook his head and continued to watch the "movie" which was a video so boring and dry, my ears started to feel like the Sahara after listening for too long.

My attention was focused on the floor after about five minutes of the sickeningly boring video. I watched a bug scuttle across it. It was moving towards me slowly. I thought that I should name it, out of the blue and named it Hank. Hank continued to crawl around, a small black dot on the dark carpet. My eyes drifted shut after a long time of watching Hank move around unnoticed.

My head sunk into my arms on my desk and I felt sleepy. The noises around me became distorted and seemingly loud and quiet at the same time. Before long, the noises and lights around me fell silent and dim.

_My eyes opened and bright light shone at me. I blinked a few time and looked around where I was. A small room filled with hockey gear and coats and shoes. It looked like the basement of my house now with Shikoba and Alfred, but it was different. It was familiar._

"_Come on, Maddie." I heard a soft voice say and I smiled. It was Mom. Real mom. I stood up and she took my hand. I didn't protest, even though I was reaching eleven. I knew this was her way out saying "I love you" when she didn't want to talk._

_We walked to the car with my hockey gear and I pushed my pads into the back seat. I sat in the front with her and my hockey stick that she gave to me. We were quickly off over the wintery ice covered roads. The sky was dark, even though it was barely 15:00. I made a joke about it and she laughed. There was silence again until I added to that joke._

"_Hey mom! It's dark and cold out, kinda like the inside of Dad's heart!" I said with a giggle and she laughed so hard, the car started to wobble. I said something about it quietly, but she was laughing too hard to notice. She looked over at me and messed up my hair._

"_You're a cute kid-" Her words were cut off._

_I wasn't even looking at her anymore. I was looking at the road, which her eyes had been off of for a while._

_Two bright yellow lights burned my eyes forever. The hood peeled up infront of me and the front of the other truck just continued to shed our front end._

_My mother looked slowly up at the gut wrenching noise and her hand shifted from my head to my shoulder faster than the truck pushed the engine through the dashboard. The airbags deployed, breaking my nose and shoving me back into the seat. I felt metal and plastic being pushed into my legs and arms and screamed in pain. The window shield shattered and glass flew everywhere, cutting my already broken face. Something ruptured the airbag pressing into my face painfully, and I was left to flop around freely._

_Because of the open window, the noise was almost deafening. The car was moving backwards now, skidding loudly on the road. I could only clutch onto the hockey stick in front of me for protection. It was broken now, but I kept all of it in my bloodied hands._

_The car came to an abrupt halt and I was slammed forward, before feeling my body being pushed hard enough to break through the window in the passenger door and to fall limply on the ground._

_My foot was yanked at sharply before that pain vanished fast and my eyes found the car tipping slowly over the edge of the road. Blue eyes stared at me for a split second before I lost sight of them_

_Shredding metal against rocks, tumbling down a mountain side. Ice under my elbows and shredded legs. Blood pouring out of me onto the roadside and melting some of the ice. Road salt pushing into my skin. Screams on pain and loss. The slamming of a car door. Hands on my shoulders. Words from a man. A phone number being dialed. Frantic speaking. Helicopter blades. Hands trying to pull away the splintered, broken hockey stick. My screams of "no". Someone shaking my shoulders._

_Someone... shaking my... shoulders..?_

My eyes shot open and my back straitened immediately, shooting up from the desk.

"Maddie, you okay..?" Asked a familiar voice. I stood up quickly without David's help. He was looking at me with worried eyes and I nodded. The teacher was standing next to him. "You wouldn't wake up, Mads." His tone was serious.

"I'm fine! I just... Bad dream! See you at lunch!" I said quickly, gathering my things from the desk and floor with shaking hands. My legs carried me out the door fast and into the crowded hallway. A book or two hand fallen out of my arms and onto the threshold to the History class, but I didn't care.

I nearly ran through the halls, my thoughts buzzing around my head, making me dizzy.

I fell to the ground and my books all spilled onto the floor. I looked up to see who crashed into me, but everything was just moving by so fast. I tried to gather my books, but my hands were stepped on multiple times, as well as my books.

The bell rang and the shroud of kids above me practically kicked me to the ground again, but the were soon gone and silence fell. I sat up and began to slowly collect my ripped apart books from all across the hall and place them carefully into my messenger bag. When I was finally done, I stood up and looked down the hall.

Red-orange pierced my subconscious and and a pain that felt like a million fish chewing into my brain pounded through my head with every one of my frequent heartbeats. Before long, my feet staggered backwards and I was at the bottom of the stairs, aching all over. My hands flew to my ears as I pulled my body to an upright position. I ran headfirst into the door from the stairs into the freshman floor, where they were having lunch, and were able to wander the halls aimlessly.

I stumbled hard into walls and through groups of kids with my eyes shut tight and my hands over my ears. My head throbbed as I ran, and I bit back a few screams and it intensified, that red-orange stare flashing in front of my eyes.

There were more stairs that I fell down, but I kept running, trying to find a quiet place.

Finally, that place came, and my face pushed into cold concrete. My headache quelled and I slowly opened my eyes. The girls locker room in the hockey rink. No one came in here but me, as I was the only girl on the team.

My breathing echoed through the small space as my hands peeled from my ears a while ago. I felt my shaking body hit the floor multiple times and also felt the blood dripping from the razor cuts in my thigh. I sat up and pulled the first aid kit from my bag and lifted my skirt and pulled down my tights to reveal wet bandages on my upper thigh. The blood had leaked through and stained my tights on the right side. I balled them up and pushed them down into the plastic bag, along with my stained bandages.

I wiped the blood off my leg and looked down at the scars. They were hideous, but I didn't care anymore. I simply cleaned and dressed the cuts, pulling each one apart and basking in my own, self induced pain. The blood leaked onto my hands, but I didn't care. I stared down and stared at my flesh. I felt happiness fill my veins from the chemicals my brain sent out as a reaction to the pain.

It was gone quickly, and I cleaned the cuts fast, dressing them too. I dug in my bag for another pair of tights and, when I found them, I pulled them on, as well as my shoes after. I sat, still shaking heavily, in the small, silent locker room. I heard my breathing and just slumped against the wall, resting until I heard the bell for the next class.

**ЖЖЖDAVID'S POVЖЖЖ**

I stared around at the door where she had run out, worried. She was shaking and muttering in her sleep, and no one gave her even a glance as they walked out the door.

"Boy what are you still doing here...?" I jumped at the teacher, Mr. Green's, voice. I looked at him confused.

"I was waking up my friend." I said, staring right at him. He stared back, confused.

"No one was sleeping in this class. Everyone left except you." He said, looking down immediately after and squishing a bug underneath his thumb on the desk Maddie was sitting.

"She just ran out and dropped her books!" I argued. A few kids were walking in now, looking at me, confused.

"Boy, do you need to go to the nurse?" He asked quietly, so the other students wouldn't stare. I shook my head quickly and walked away, trying to distance myself from him, picking up her books by the door and pushing them into my bag.

I would have to talk to her later, but not then, I was getting late to Spanish II, and I'd ditched it far to much. I was still worried for Madelyn though.

**ЖЖЖJASPER'S POVЖЖЖ**

_What was that?_

That was her! And she just stumbled backwards down a fight of stairs! I had heard the thuds and everything!

It was her, with her purple eyes that I couldn't remove from my vision. I took a step towards the stairwell, but I felt Mathias' hand pull my arm, forcing me into the class. He pushed me into my seat and I heard him sigh in relief when the teacher turned around to look at the class, and didn't notice we came in late.

He spoke lowly about what we were doing that day, which was a work sheet out of the book and a video as always. As soon as the worksheet was handed out, everyone started talking loudly, and no matter how hard the teacher tried, he failed.

"What was that, man?!" Mathias said, punching me in the shoulder. "Why'd you try and go back? Whatever you dropped isn't important."

"Didn't you see her?!" I asked, freaking out a bit. "A girl just fell backwards down the stairs!" Matt looked at me with raised eyebrows. "What?! I saw her!"

"Maybe you should lay off the drugs before school." He said with a chuckle.

"I don't do drugs! Stop saying I do because of the stereotype of my country! We're nothing like-" He punched my shoulder again.

"Calm down man, I was making a joke."

"She was real!" I said, pleading with him to believe me. He rolled his eyes fast and leaned his chair onto two feet. "I _saw_ her. She was the one I told you about at the bakery!"

"The one with purple eyes?"

"_Yes_!" I grabbed his arm. "You said that she sounded familiar!" He tapped his chin in thought, or at least feigning thought.

"Can't remember." He muttered, obviously losing interest in the girl that seemed to only be in my imagination. I threw my hands in the air in frustration, but it wasn't out of place in the huge, loud class. "What?" He asked, sounding a bit annoyed, which was rare for him.

"I saw that girl. The one with the triangle barrettes, and the blonde pigtails, and the freckles!" I said, almost begging for him to think of me as sane. I hadn't seen her for months since that dream... if it was a dream...

"Jonny," He used a nickname of my nickname, Johan. Funny, really. "Drop it, man. You're just like, hallucinating on dehydration or something." He reached down and pulled out a water bottle from his bag and forced it into my hands. I obliged to take a sip, because he always had a weird concoction of juices in there that tasted amazing.

I gave it back to him and looked at the door for a split second, wondering about her. Wondering about the girl with those purple eyes that I knew I saw fall off the bridge.

I shook myself from that thought and looked around the room, crazy as usual, but at least nothing bad was actually happening. My brain focused on the work for once, trying to avert my thoughts from that girl.

**ϪϪϪMADELYN'S POV+TIMESKIPϪϪϪ**

"Mads, you're shaking."

"No I'm not!"

"Yes, you are."

"Don't touch me!"

David crossed his arms to say "fine" and went back to eating his lunch. I was sitting with him and some of the hockey team. Gilbert, James and Ivan were just chatting up up next to us, and I was trying not to freak out.

"Oh! Madders!"

_I'm getting sick of these nicknames..._ I thought,_ just call me Madelyn or Maddie for god's sake._

"Yes, Gilbert?" I asked, pulling on the sleeves of my hoodie.

"Coach said we have practice today. And, he needs to talk to you about something he found in the girl's locker room, he's wondering if it's yours." My heart jumped into my throat as he laughed. He made a comment about female hygiene and the pill or something, but I was far too scared to think about that.

_Did I leave something in there? _I thought,_ I thought I cleaned everything up! When if I got blood on the floor!_

A punch on my shoulder from Ivan lurched me from my thoughts, as well as my chair, as I ended up on the ground. I bit back a shout when some kid stepped on my hand. He was blabbering in a Spanish accent to an obviously annoyed kid. He was one of the Italian triplets, and I assumed the guy talking was Antonio.

I accepted both Ivan and David's help off the floor and plopped back down in my seat. It was common for him to underestimate his strength like that.

"Madelyn, before I knocked you over, I wanted to say to cheer up. Today isn't so bad! We get to practice today, da?" I nodded and returned to my food. Well, the empty space where food was supposed to be. I didn't have the money to buy food today, nor did I bother to bring a lunch.

My gaze was fixed on the table in front of me with my hands on the edge of it, half covered up with the sleeves of my hoodie. I felt David's eyes staring me down for almost five minutes before I looked up at him. His jaw was set and he was staring me down, trying to get me to squirm. Unfortunately, he was always able to do that.

My gaze fell to the table again and my small, fiddling hands. He was still staring at me, I knew it.

I was surprised when I saw a sandwich slide into my view. I looked up at him.

"Eat." He muttered, obviously still frustrated with me.

"No. I can't take your food."

"You're shaking still. It's been hours since that class. You need to eat. And plus, you're going to be kicking these guys' butts later, so you need the energy." He said, and a smile pulled at my lips. I was surprised at how he could do that, every time. "Eat, to kick butts."

"I'll agree to that." I slowly muttered and started nibbling at the sandwich. He laughed a bit at me. "What?" I asked, with him still chuckling.

"You're a dork." He said and we fell silent again. Before long, the bell rang and I headed to health class. Apparently we were starting a suicide and self injury unit, paired with mental illnesses. How Ironic.

**ΞΞΞTIMESKIPΞΞΞ**

"Maddie, you can't scream 'die' every time you hit the puck." Coach said sternly after he was almost hit by the puck I'd hit. I heard Gilbert snicker behind me. "That goes for you too, Berwald." I looked back at the Swede acting as the goalie. Gilbert kept giggling. "Gilbert, you're just a freak, so stop giggling like an idiot." It was my turn to laugh and skate off.

Coach continued to make up laugh for another ten minutes as we rested. The brown haired girl that was giving us snacks plopped down next to me. Her name was Anastázia Szader.

"You're really brave to play with all those guys." She said quietly. She seemed shy, as I didn't talk to her much. "I mean, it must be tough, with them beating you up all the time." I chuckled and took a drink.

"Nah, man. _I'm_ the one that beats these guys up." I said and saw Mathias stick his tongue out at me out of the corner of my eye. "I'm squishy and all, but it's blubber, to keep me warm and safe!" I said, laughing a bit. The only time I would talk like this was when I was playing hockey. Hockey made me feel strong, and that meant me coming out of my shell a bit more. I wasn't my quiet self when I played hockey. I was so much more like Alfred, it was crazy.

She laughed at my blubber statement and I went on to show her my squishy belly. Quite a few of the guys laughed at me and my statement of "Come on Anya, poke my blubber!"

Much later, after everything was set right, and I got to know Anastázia better, I went into the locker room to change out of my gear. It smelled like sweat and blood, so I packed it into my bag to wash it at home.

As I pulled my hoodie on, there was a knock on the door.

"I'm decent!" I shouted and the door creaked open. Coach leaned on the doorframe and the memory from lunch filled my mind.

_What did he find..?_ I thought, scared.

A brief second later, he held up a key chain.

"Is this yours?" He asked, and I exhaled deeply in relief.

"No, it's to pink for me. It's probably Anya's or one of Ivan's sisters' or something." I said, my voice much more calm and cool than I expected.

"Thanks." He said. "Get home safe." He said and walked off.

I slumped against the lockers and breathed heavily to calm my heart rate. The fear leaked out of my blood eventually and I stood, legs and arms shaking. When I got home, all I would do would be to lay down and let Kumajiro play with my arms. I missed him, really. It was a long day, and, as I exited, I sighed. My head was pounding and my eyes felt like they were sucked of all moisture. My hands and feet were cold, and I was just exhausted.

When I got home, it would be better.

**A/N2: Are you happy now? This was a whopping 8 pages! That's 5200+ words, man! My wrists hurt from typing the majority of this in 3 hours, and my brain hurts from how much I had to think for this.**

**Well, I love all you readers, and, have a good morning, afternoon, evening, or night, and please review.**

**Later.**


	4. Broken

**A/N: Were you happy with that last chapter? No? Well, have another one, just not as long.**

**So.. later in this fic, I might have to change the rating to M, for... reasons. Mainly because I like to torture our poor Madelyn, no joke.**

**And, I lied, this is in, like, October, just so you know. And this is my made up town, Fairview-ridge, so the weather here can be as screwed up as I want!**

**Well, let this chapter begin, very slowly in Maddie's POV!**

Where was he?

Alfred was supposed to pick me up. But, more times than not, he forgot and played video games when he was supposed to drive back to the school and pick me up. I called him a few times, and the house phone before I realized, he wouldn't ever pick up. I knew that David was taking care of his baby sister and brother, so he wouldn't take the time out either. Everyone from the hockey team was gone, so I had no ride.

Looks like I'm walking home... _again_.

My feet trudged down the long gravel road from the school to the actual town. The forest surrounding me on all sides didn't bother me, I actually liked the quietness

The water that soaked the gravel all of today had started to freeze over because it was reaching night. My feet slid around in the slush of dirt, rocks and ice slurry. A sigh escaped my lips just before I fell butt first on the ground. I swore softly and pushed myself off the ground, wincing from the rocks pushing into the skin on my hands. When I was up, I picked out the rocks and pressed the bloody holes in my hands into my black and red plaid skirt, where the stains wouldn't be noticed.

Eventually, the trees broke and I found myself walking on a suitable sidewalk. Cars passed by and I chuckled. Rich people, how lovely. All of them having their own fancy little cars. Well, big cars, but that's not the point.

I hitched my bags up higher on my shoulders and crossed the street quickly. I wasn't surprised when people just bumped into me like crazy. No one saw me anyway. That looked at me, but not at _me_. They were just looking through me. I felt depression claw at my insides but ignored it the best I could.

I pulled my red and white hoodie close to me and made a mental note to wear another coat over this one tomorrow. That was, unless Al didn't steal it. He would, most likely, even though he's the one with the car with heating.

I tried to remove my mind from the internal rant at him and kept walking. Before long, my feet carried me to somewhere I didn't want to be. It was that street filled with shops and that bakery. The one I passed in the dream. The one with those bright orange eyes.

My shoulders shook as I half ran past the place, crashing into a boy with blonde hair and was about my hight. He was taking a sign back into his shop.

I picked up my things and ran before he could talk to me. I was glad he didn't have those eyes. The ones that made me feel like I was imploding.

Before long, I tripped and stumbled down the hill, falling into what should have been a snowbank, but it was a puddle of half frozen mud and slush from the street. My gym bag was farther down the hill, but only by a little. I breathed heavily to calm myself and to gather my wits. My chest and stomach shook and breathing rattled through my body. Tears tried to slip down my face, but I tried my best to stop them. My knees curled into my chest as I laid in the muddy slush. I just wanted to go home.

I sat up after a few minutes, not caring about the muddy snow slush in my hair and covering my hoodie, skirt, and tights. I pulled myself to my feet and didn't bother brushing myself off before grabbing my bag. It seemed heavier than before as I trudged up the slippery hill.

Once I was back on the street, I was almost knocked right back down by someone biking past. I resisted trying to catch up with them and simply walked along the sidewalk.

In about 20 minutes, I was walking up the curved sidewalk to my house. I didn't bother knocking or opening the door quietly, I just barged in, threw my things on the floor, and walked into the living room, not acknowledging my mother sitting on the couch and simply dropping down on the opposite side of the couch.

"Madelyn!" She said in a half surprised, half angry tone. "You're destroying the couch!" I looked over at her, emotionless, before simply looking back at the television. "Madelyn. You do not ignore me! Get off the couch and clean this mess up!"

"Have Alfred do it. He's your kid too." I nearly growled, but still in my soft voice. It had a... _strange_ effect to say the least.

"You do _not_ take that that tone with me, young lady!" She protested and stood up, trying to prompt me to do the same. When I didn't budge she took it into her own hands and pulled me off the couch. "I'm not going to clean up the mess from your mud wrestling!" I raised my eyebrows at her, just trying to say to buzz off without words. It didn't work, sadly.

With a few minutes of her screaming, she forced me to clean up all the mess I'd made off the couch and floor. When I was done, I walked up the stairs to my bedroom.

Kumajiro was waiting at the closed door, as my mother didn't want him roaming around the house. I sighed as I looked at his happy face. He was waiting all day, poor guy. I have to remember to bring him to the next hockey practice. Everyone loved playing with him on the ice, and he loved it too. I would need to talk to coach though. He'd have to take care of him while I was in class.

I shook my head and tossed my bags onto the wood of my floor. I walked to the bathroom connected to my room quickly and stripped of my clothing. I'd made sure the door to my room was locked before doing so and I stepped into the small shower next to the toilet. I turned on the water, not caring about the temperature and just letting it loosen the dirt and grime in my hair and on my skin. A weird sensation was on my thigh and I looked down.

My bandages were slipping off of my leg, as I forgot to take them off before stepping in the shower. I let the bandages soaked with dried blood fall off and onto the ground. After I was clean, I stood for a few minutes in the scorching hot water before stepping out and wrapping myself in a towel. Before going into my room, I cleaned and bandaged with cuts on my leg.

Kuma was whining in my room and I sighed before seeing what was wrong. He was rummaging through my school bag and getting covered with dirt. He pulled the bag with my bloodstained tights and bandages out, whimpering. I pulled it from his mouth and stuffed it into the trash. The tights weren't even salvageable anymore, as the blood had just stuck to everything in the bag.

I dried off quickly and dressed in a pair of thick sweat pants and a t-shirt. Instead of going downstairs with my dirty clothing, as Mom would just yell at me for mucking up the washing machine, I pulled out a few buckets from the storage closet and started to fill them up in the shower, one with hot water, two with cold.

Before long, I had my clothing line up and was washing my clothes with my small television on so I didn't fell as lonely. Kuma sat on my bed after I got the dirt out of his fur, and curled up with my pillow.

I jumped at a knock on the door, because I hadn't heard and footsteps on the stairs.

"Maddie..." I heard Alfred's voice from outside the door and sighed.

"You can come in." I said quietly and the door creaked open. He closed the door behind him, as that was my policy for anyone coming into my room.

"It's so cold up here..." He said as he plopped down in my desk chair. I had a heater running under my clothes to dry them, which was a bit dangerous, albeit efficient. "Maddie, Mom didn't send me to talk to you." His words were true. "I heard her screaming at you and I wanted to say sorry for not picking you up from practice." I chuckled at the fact that he only heard her, as I was completely silent through it all.

"Al, it's fine. I figured you were doing something with someone, like playing video games with one of your friends." I said and started hanging up my hockey gear.

"No! It's not okay! You had to walk home in 35 degree weather!" He said, seeming to be mad at himself. I silently put my hand on his shoulder, calm as usual. I didn't even have to say a thing for him to know what I was thinking. "Okay. I'm still sorry. I'll make it up to you, okay Maddie?" I nodded and went back to my laundry, which was practically done.

I wasn't exactly surprised when he ran out for ten minutes, as that was his sort of thing. I was tempted to ask him to close the door when he left, but he was too far down the hall, and my voice didn't travel that far.

I sighed yet again and continued to hang my laundry up. Kuma hopped off my bed and started walking around my ankles. I messed up his fur a bit and dumped my dirty water down the drain in my shower before walking back into my room and closing my door.

As soon as I sat down, it burst open again, with Alfred holding video games and junk food.

"Don't tell Mom I have these." He muttered and tossed the bags of chips, chocolate and candy onto the bed. He turned around and looked out my door to see if Mom was following him. Apparently, she wasn't, as he closed the door quickly and plopped down on my floor. "Come on, we're playing some video games and eating food until three in the morning." He said, looking around at me. I couldn't hold back a laugh and dragged a blanket onto the floor for us to sit on.

I dug my hand into the chips as Al turned on the gaming system and placed a disk inside. I did have to admit, the chips were the most heavenly thing I'd tasted in a while, because my mother was so strict on the junk food ban. She was indeed a health nut and restricted us from all the junk food we ever wanted, because apparently one potato chip would poison the body and soul.

She didn't know how amazing M&M's are.

After a while of simply eating junk food, I looked up at the menu screen and saw it was a sports game. A hockey game.

He knew I would beat him, but picked it so I could...

That actually is really sweet.

Before I could get emotional, since not really anyone does that type of stuff for me, I picked up the controller and nearly immediately beat him.

An hour or two later, I heard Mom's footsteps downstairs and threw the blanket over the junk food and my lap, as well as Alfred's. She walked up the stairs as I killed his character in a video game.

"Hey guys." She said, poking her head in. She payed no regard to the fact that I wanted _everyone_ to knock _every time_ they came in, no matter how loud their footsteps were. "I'm just going to say goodnight, because I'm going out to work, okay?" We grunted in response, intent on the game. "Don't stay up to late." We grunted again. "Love you."

"Love you too." We said in unison. Even with growing up and growing apart as siblings, we still had the same strange bond to say things at the exact same time. I heard her walk away and groaned in annoyance. She didn't close the door. I tried to ask her too, but again, she couldn't hear me.

Al paused the game so I could close the door and uncover the food.

It was a long time before we ran out of food, and even longer before we got tired of the games.

At around two thirty, Al went downstairs to sleep, and I cleaned up the evidence of junk food. When I was walking outside to the dumpsters, I slipped on the sidewalk and fell down painfully. The wrappers and bags fell from my grasp and scattered across the yard, and I simply tried to collect them, painstakingly. After a while of wondering through a layer of frost and ice, I threw out the trash and walked back inside. I could just throw it away in the normal trash, as my mother would find it.

I pushed through the door and trudged upstairs to my room. Kumajiro was waiting patiently on the bed. I sighed and petted his head roughly.

"I have homework to do, babe." His ears drooped at my tone. I'm not sure if he understands what I say, really, but he gets my emotions. "I'll be staying up really late, I got homework for nearly every class." He stood up on his hind legs and grabbed hold of my arm, trying desperately to keep me there.

I pulled him along and started doing my homework with him in my lap. He slept there, keeping my lap warm. My legs fell asleep quickly, but Kuma was too cute to move.

I didn't dare look at the time when I slumped onto my desk, done with the homework, and too tired to move. My eyes drifted shut, sleeping for only what felt like second, before I felt hands shaking me awake.

I groaned loudly and looked up with half-lidded eyes.

"Come one, it's Wednesday." I heard Alfred say quietly. "And you don't even have practice. You can come home and relax." His words went strait over my head, as I didn't even want to listen. I just wanted to stay home and be quiet underneath my covers, which had magically appeared on my body.

"No.." I muttered quietly. He didn't hear me and ripped off my covers. I didn't react from the cold and sat up, not caring anymore. I pushed Al out of the room, but he walked out on his own without my prompting after a few seconds.

I stood and pulled on my skirt for school, as well as the dress shirt and tie I was required to wear. The rest of my uniform was found and put on. The bandages on my leg were dry, so I didn't change them. My hoodie went on next, as usual. I brushed my hair methodically and walked through the house, Kuma trailing behind me.

Al waited in the kitchen, messing around on his phone. He was texting someone, inevitably.

"Al, let's go." I said, but I got no response. I stood with my arms crossed for a bit. "Al." I said again, to get his attention. When he simply stared at his phone, I frowned and turned to the fridge. I made the biggest fuss about getting out Kumajiro's food, making as much noise as possible. He didn't look up.

I was getting sick of it by the time I was done, and pushed him in the shoulder. He didn't move. I had enough with his ignoring me and ripped the phone from his hands.  
>"Hey!" He half-shouted. He saw it was me and relaxed. I always had a reason to grab his phone.<p>

"It's time to go to school." I muttered angrily. He walked past me after I handed him his phone, and out to the car. We drove to school in silence.

I stepped from the car when it stopped and walked away, just wanted to get the day over with. My math class was on the second floor, so, I walked up the stairs begrudgingly. I entered the classroom and almost immediately got pushed to the floor by a group of girls, gossiping. The point of one of their heels stabbed into my hand painfully.

I bit my lip as I grabbed the folders that fell out of my bag. I was frustrated when kids stepped on my things, but kept quiet as I finished cleaning up.

I went to my seat and watched people pour in the class room, until the bell rang. David sat next to me, as usual, and we got to work. Hartwell, the teacher walked over to both of us.

"Do you to want to sit in here all period? We're just doing everything we did for all the last month." He muttered, obviously angry at the class. They were all chatting up a storm, and I could barely hear myself think.

"No thanks," David said politely. He knew that last time it happened, Hartwell forgot to give me credit for the day.

For the rest of the period, we sat there and spoke about random stuff. David did most of the talking. We didn't have to do the work, since we already knew it, and Hartwell was forced to teach the subject until kids got it, or he ran out of material to teach that unit with.

"Do you think the administration cares about this class?" David asked out of the blue.

"No. Not one bit." I said quietly as I scanned the class. There was about 5 kids that were actually somewhat intelligent. I knew their names, but they didn't know I existed.

"What are you doing in here?" I heard Hartwell ask and looked up. I fell out of my seat and grabbed my head from it pounding so hard. Memories of that night came flooding into my head again, and all I could do was try not to scream.

David fell to his knees next to me, worried. I couldn't make out words through the burning pain. I heard so many voices, all pressing into my skull trying to break it. It took a few minutes for me to open my eyes. I simply saw the worried face of David and a bunch of legs, chairs tables, and kids.

"What the fuck was that?"

_Orange-red._


	5. Friends

**A/N: Yes. I updated. What a strange phenomenon.**

**Sorry, I shouldn't be excusing such horrid acts, but I have to. I have school, I've been deathly sick, and I'm in the higher level classes. So. Much. Homework. (Even in summer!)**

**Also, I have a boyfriend! I have a life! But I still feel very guilty for not updating. I will be trying to update sooner, because I have more time. Although, I'll be reading real books more and stuff, so yeah.**

**Yeah, there's a bunch of head cannons in here. Jasper is dyslexic, Lux, Belgium, and Ned are born to different mothers (First off, this explains why they're all of different nationalities, and second, it's something in History is Now), and some others. It's to make it better, so don't get all butt-hurt. I'm sick of that on a bunch of my stories.**

**So, this is going to start in Jasper's (It's Johan..) POV, the day before we left off. He's at his house/job/bakery thing.**

**Enjoy!**

"Dad. She had purple eyes! How can you not remember?" I was growing more and more frustrated at his blank expression. "You took her order! She was at my school today!"

He stared, his eyebrows furrowed. I could tell he was actually trying to remember. It took a few minutes for him to give up.

"We need security cameras." He said and turned back to the oven, which had a tray of cupcakes that were done. I sighed heavily and turned around to the cookies I was frosting. It was mind numbing, but better than the math homework I was supposed to do. It was nearly impossible because of my dyslexia, but Bella always helped.

Speaking of Bella, I heard her coughing from upstairs. She had been sick since the middle of September, but she had a strange mentality of "I _have_ to go to school!" As a result, she had to stay upstairs and away from the bakery, so she wouldn't get the customers sick.

I heard her footsteps on the stairs and watched her walk from the staircase with a face mask on. I smiled at her just watching us. It was actually pretty funny.

Instead of staring at my sister, I turned to look outside. Henri was putting up a sign for our special tomorrow, but something was strange.

In a few seconds, a body came running across the sidewalk, crashing into Henri. I stared, seeing a sweaty, scared blonde girl frantically get up and try to get around him. She was wearing a red and white pullover hoodie and one of the uniform skirts from the school. The red and blue plaid was distinct to our school. Her gym bag was from the school too. It was a medium blue with red straps.

She was mumbling frantically, and trying to get her mind strait. Her hair was falling out of her pigtails, and a cold sweat tracked down her freckly cheeks. Her violet eyes darted everywhere until she started sprinting again.

_Violet eyes._

I dropped the piping bag on the counter and bolted through the kitchen and front room to the outside. I pushed Henri aside and started running. Football made it so much easier to run for long periods of time. The entire game is literally running around and having a referee shout "goal" for five minutes once or twice in the game, if at all.

I ran for so long, and I tried screaming at her, but she had a huge lead on me, and damn, she could run.

My legs gave up and I watched her run out of my sight. I sighed and turned around, panting and seeing how far I ran. It was a ten minute walk. My legs wanted to give up, but I kept moving.

A car sped past me and I was coated in the disgusting sludge from the street. I shuddered and wiped it off my face and hair. I needed new gel, because I used all I had that morning.

I chuckled, thinking about using mud as gel, and a passing stranger stared at me. I rolled my eyes and got home fast.

I walked in through the back door, as not to bother the customers. Bella was wandering around the back room, and stared at my disheveled appearance, horrified.

"What the hell?!" She exclaimed. "You run out of the store for no reason, then you come back looking like this?!" Her voice was loud enough to carry to the front of the store and catch someone's attention.

Henri rushed in and stared at me, appalled.

"What the..?" He was thoroughly confused.

"I was chasing after that girl! I told you I saw her before!" I said, both of them looking worried instead of horrified at my appearance.

"There was no girl, Jasper." Bella said from behind her mask. She looked extremely worried over my metal health at this point. Henri had the same face.

"Jasper," He said, trying to cover up the worry in his voice, "Maybe you've been stressing over school too much. I think you need to relax, maybe take a nice long bath." I stared at him, frustrated and disbelieving. I saw her! How could they say she wasn't there?! She bumped into him!

"Fine." I grumbled and started to walk up the winding stairs. "Henri, can you finish the cookies I was working on?" I asked. I didn't care for his answer, as I was already upstairs.

I quickly got to my room and stripped my dirty clothes off.

I walked into the bathroom and turned on the shower. It took a long time to wash off all the grime and the water to run clear down the drain. It was freezing cold on my skin by the time I got out. I dried off my frozen skin and got dressed in sweatpants and a t-shirt.

The math homework sat on my bed, and I simply stared at it. I hated that class. I couldn't do the math to save my life.

I sat down on the bed anyway and pulled out the notebook I used for scratch paper. It had scribbles and markings on every inch of the page.

Four hours later, I stuffed all of my homework into my bag. I was done. It was painful how the teachers schemed to assign all the homework at the same time, with the same due date. Then they did the assessments on the same day too. It was hell for my brain.

I laid down in bed and heard my father cleaning up shop downstairs. He was counting out the money from the register and wrote it down for the end of the week.

I pulled my blanket from the base of my bed to my shoulders. The warmth cradled me to sleep.

_My eyes blearily opened to the moon. It was well past midnight. I rolled off my bed and stumbled around my room. I had to be awake for a reason, I don't know why, but I had to. I slipped my shirt on and walked slowly down the stairs. I stopped at the bottom as I saw something that gave me a small heart attack._

_I saw a teenage girl straiten up from looking down at the cakes in the window. She was wearing a hoodie with a Canadian flag on it. It was cute. She looked up and stared strait at me. I backed into the corner quickly, and she turned and walked away. I was confused._

_Why would someone be up this late and walking around town? All the shops are closed._

_I moved from the shadows, not bothering to put on shoes. The girl was too fascinating to ignore. My feet hit the frozen sidewalk and I looked down the street. She was a long way down for how little time I spent getting out of the shop._

_I moved quickly after her, but she seemed to be faster. She was walking to the bridge. I was confused as I walked, but still followed._

_Fear started to overcome me when I saw her walk onto the bridge. She lifted herself onto the fence. I started running, as I was too far behind to get to her walking. She stared at the sky for a moment before looking away. I was close enough to see tears streaming down her face._

"_Hey!" I shouted, but she gave no response. "Hey you!" I was still to far away to help. "Girl! What are you doing?!" I was on the bridge, and she was getting ready to jump. "Get down from there! You could fall!" I said it too late, she was already trying to jump off. "STOP!" I screamed just as I got there. I pushed my arm through the chain link fence. It tore into my skin, but I didn't care. My hand brushed on the side of her sleeve, as I missed grabbing it._

_I yelled in anger as she fell, but something happened. She opened her eyes and stared up at me. Her eyes were a vivid shade of lavender that pierced my soul. She kept eye contact with me until she hit the water below her. She was most definitely knocked out, if not killed. Her body washed away quickly in the water._

I shot up from my bed in terror. My heat was racing and my entire body was shaking.

Those nightmares would always plague my mind. I just felt so scared and powerless. That girl dove off a bridge in front of me.

The police filed a report and searched everywhere for a missing girl, or a body. Nothing turned up. It was eerie how she was just invisible. I had to talk to a psychologist for a month, and my family was thinking about sending me back for how I've been acting.

I looked over at the time, trying to shake the feeling of that nightmare. It was nearly five. I would have had to wake up around now anyway.

I ran my hands through my hair before slowly standing up. I walked to the bathroom and brushed my hair and teeth. I pulled out the pill bottles from the cupboard that one of the many doctors had prescribed to me. I hated them, and my family only teased me about it. Apparently I was furthering my national stereotype. The first time they said it, I wanted to dump all of the pills down the toilet. I didn't do it out of good sense.

"Jazzy!" Bella practically yelled as she burst through the door to my room.

"No." I muttered and searched around for an extra can of hair gel. It bothered me that I had to go the school with my hair down. "Get out." I said strictly as she pushed open the door to my bathroom too.

"I infected dad." She said, almost joyously. I groaned audibly, knowing the implications. "You're going to be staying up late to clean up and clean up the registers." She said, a bit muffled from the face mask she was wearing to try to prevent people from getting sick. Ironic.

"Great. I would _love_ to do all the extra work, on top of my schoolwork _and_ working in the bakery. It would make me _so_ happy." I said. I looked at her condescendingly after I was done talking.

"Okay!" She said and practically skipped off.

My sarcasm was completely wasted on her...

I walked to my room and changed into my school uniform before walking downstairs to don my apron and do the morning baking. We had to prepare many things in the shop before we opened. We worked for more than an hour before finishing.

I walked to the front to put up a sign on the door that said "Sorry! We're not open!" In huge letters at the top and smaller letters below saying "We have had an unexpected halt in our production. We will be open at 16:00."

At 6:40 all three of us started walking to the high school. I had no idea why it had to start at such an absurdly early time. We all complained about it starting at 7:15, because then we had to wake up at an even more absurdly early time to work.

"Johan!" I heard a familiar voice cry from a car. I looked up at Matthias in his huge truck. He waved us to him as he waited at a stoplight. "You guy need a ride?" He asked. I looked at my siblings who had already turned away and started walking. They tried to ride with him once. They were traumatized for life because he was rear-ended.

I opened the door anyway and climbed in.

"Why did they run away?" He asked as he drove away from the light.

"They don't know that you're not a half bad driver. They think it's your fault that you got in a crash." I said and watched kids walking to school.

"Not my fault!" He said loudly. I rolled my eyes and looked over at him. He was shaking and it looked like sweat was running down his face. He was gripping the steering wheel far tighter than needed. It shocked me to say the least. His voice was so happy and energetic. Although, he had a talent of changing his voice.

"Dude, the wheel isn't your father's throat." I said in a joking manner. His grip only tightened. I could tell I made a mistake. "Pull over." I said, but it only flew over his head. "Matt. Pull over."

Instead of doing that he looked over at me. He had a scared look on his face. I didn't expect any of this when I got in the car.

"Am I crazy?" He asked. He was trying to keep that happy voice, but it cracked.

My brain tried to understand what was going on. He looked like he was traumatized. He slowed down while he was driving, which made me panic a bit less.

"No. You are one of the most sane people I will ever meet." I said without a falter in my voice. He looked back at the road and pulled over into a parking lot. "But, dude, what's wrong?"

It took him a while to unstick his hands from the steering wheel. He looked at me with what seemed like a desperate expression.

He was a lot more lanky than he seemed. When he let his shoulders drop, it was apparent how skinny he actually was. He didn't spike his hair today and he was wearing dirty clothing. He looked really truly pathetic. He obviously hadn't slept that night, or barely slept at all. I knew he had a horrible home situation, but I had only seen him this bad once in the past.

"My dad." He said and stared at his hands. I looked too and saw his fingernails were bitten to stubs. Some were bleeding. "He got drunk." That was all the explanation he needed to give.

His father was abusive when he got drunk, and Matt took the brunt of it. His little sister, Kiista, was only 6 or 7, so he wanted to keep her safe. He was more of a father than the actual man of the house.

"Do you need to stay over?" I asked, very concerned for my friend. "Your sister can stay too." I added. He looked up at me and smiled. I knew that was a yes.

It took him a few minutes to recuperate, but we managed to drive away.

I had actually never seen him this much out of character. He looked horrible. He had probably slept in his truck last night, and that would explain the tiredness, the dirty clothes, and the hair.

We arrived at school at around 6:55, because we pulled over for almost ten minutes.

Matthias rummaged around in his car. He was looking for hair gel. I popped open the glove compartment, and sorted through the napkins to find the small canister. I handed it him so he could at least look like he was a little bit put together. I also handed him the tie in the backseat so he wouldn't get yelled at by a teacher for being out of uniform.

I waited for him to scrounge up papers from the back which looked like homework. He looked at me for a second.

"Thanks man." He said, but I could tell he was doing horrible inside.

It didn't take long for the bell to ring for the start of school and for us to rush inside.

My first period was to be an office assistant. That really meant hanging out with one of the cooler counselors, Ms. Jenny, and occasionally running around to hand out schedule changes or notes for students to go to the health office, or a certain classroom.

It was halfway through the period when I had to run to a math class to give someone called Lilly Heller a pass.

I walked through the familiar halls to the math class. I could hear the loud voices of children from down the hall. I shuddered and entered the classroom, heading strait to the teacher. Out of the corner of my eye I saw a Hispanic boy staring at the floor.

I quickly handed the purple slip of paper before turning to leave. As I was walking, I was distracted by that kid I had just seen, he was looking worried towards the ground. I walked up to him to see a person on the ground. It was a girl, and she had her hands clapped over her ears. Her eyes were squeezed shut and she was shaking.

"Maddie.." The Hispanic guy said, obviously scared. He reached out to touch her shoulder. He said a few more things, but I wasn't paying attention. I was looking at the girl on the floor with the utmost amazement.

Her blonde hair looked like it had a slight silver tint, most likely from stress. I could see that she was small under her hoodie. She looked like she was abnormally thin, but still athletic. She also looked strangely clean. He hair was brushed strangely perfectly, and her face didn't have a blemish.

It was strange of all things when she finally stopped shaking and opened her eyes.

Something clicked in my brain, and I could only stare at her in disbelief.

"I saw you-" I started saying before a hand on my shoulder cut me off.

"Jasper, shouldn't you be going back to the office?" Hartwell said forcefully. I nodded as I stared at the girl. I walked out quickly without speaking.

It was her...

**ΞΞΞTIMESKIPΞΞΞ**

"It was her!" I said desperately, but Matthias shook his head with a faint smile. He was looking a lot better than this morning. "She was there! In this classroom! A kid was even talking to her!"

"Dude, stop." He said. "You're stressing yourself out."

"He called her Maddie." I said seriously. A faint light of recognition flashed through his eyes, but it quickly faded. He took his head in his hand, like he had a headache.

"Blonde hair, lavender eyes and her name is Maddie..." He said slowly, as if he was trying to jog his memory. I sat there, hoping he would remember something, because I knew I wasn't crazy. "It's like déjà vu, trying to think about her. It's like you remembered something in a dream, but you don't remember when you wake up, until you try to remember that thing in real life."

I sat, confused.

"Um, what?" I asked, confused. We were at my house, it was around 21:00, and the shop was closed. I was supposed to clean up, but it could wait.

"Nothing." He said and looked at his little sister, sleeping on a cot on the side of the room. She fell asleep quickly, and by now, she wouldn't wake up. "You need to go downstairs and clean up." He said. "I'm going to take a shower."

I nodded and walked downstairs.

The lights were turned off in the front room, but one light in the kitchen was on. It was always on. I looked out of the front windows and out of nowhere, I got this horrible, crippling headache.

My entire body went numb and I had to hold my head to stop the spinning. I was so confused, what was happening?

Eventually, I was able to open my eyes to find I was on the floor. I hadn't felt myself fall, and my arms and legs were numb. It tool a while, but I finally was able to get up.

I stumbled the the cash register and the computer. I started the math about the expenses and the money and everything.

It took less time than I thought it would. I walked to the hallway behind the kitchen to check on my father and brother in their rooms.

My dad was sleeping soundly, wrapped up in his blanket, and my brother was at his desk, working on schoolwork.

I walked back out and to the stairs, and finally to my room. I didn't bother to check on Bella, she was probably on her computer.

I walked into my room to find it still empty. I thought I heard the shower stop a while before, so I was confused at why Matt was still in there. His bag was also gone from the room, so I felt I needed to investigate.

I peeked in the bathroom door to see him sitting on the counter, with pants on. I was thankful about that, but something was off. He was wrapping up his wrist in bandages, and there were cotton balls on the sink, varying from a light pink, to what looked like a few soaked with blood.

"Matt." I said sternly, as I was concerned, and watched him jump off the counter and press himself against the back wall. He looked terrified.

"You're dyslexic. It's hard for you to do math. How did you get done so quickly?" He asked in a cool voice, completely opposite of his body language.

"Does that really matter?!" I exclaimed, but I was quickly shushed by Matt. I remembered his sister sleeping, and clenched my jaw out of frustration.

"I can explain." He said, still in a calm voice. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. I opened them to see him slightly peeled off the wall, standing stiffly. He exhaled, and I saw him shake visibly, looking down at his wrists. "You know exactly what I'm doing." I nodded, because I had talked to him about injuring himself before. "I just... I can't do this anymore. I can't take care of Kiista, go to school, go to hockey practice, and stay sane. It started hurting when I couldn't stop her from crying, and I just needed something to distract me from the pain."

I listened to what he had to say, trying to keep a cool head. I had slowly closed the door while he talked, and was leaning on it by the end. He was staring at his hands, watching them shake.

"Matt," I said, trying not to sound angry or anything, "I know you do this for your own reasons, and nosing around in them is none of my business. It _is_ my job to take care of my friends, and you are one of the few. This is bad for you, and I understand what you're going through-"

"No. You don't understand." He said, cutting off my sentence, starting to look angry.

"-I understand what you're going through is rough, _Matt_." I said, also with a certain tone of anger in my voice. "But you and I both know this is bad for you."

He sighed, looking as though he was forcing rage down. I wanted to help, but he wasn't going to let me.

"I know, _Jasper_," He said, putting the same emphasis on my name, as I did on his. "But you don't know how hard it is to stop!"

"Maybe I don't know how difficult it is because I have some self control!" I said, not caring about the malice in my voice anymore. I watched his eyes narrow. He was fuming because of the jab I had just made about him hurting himself again.

"Self control?! You want to see what self control is?!" He asked, and I saw the rage in his eyes. He ripped off his over shirt and stared at me expectantly. "Self control is getting these and not hitting back, and I sure as _hell_ know that you would beat a man dead if he did this."

I saw several dark bruises peaking out from below his undershirt, as well as several sickly yellow patches, that were obviously at least a few days old. There were a few small circular scars in his arm, one was a scab. I wanted to look away, but was fixated on the scars on his chest and arms. I managed to pull my eyes to the ground.

I swallowed, looking back at his face. It held a tone of sorrow in the sickeningly furious expression. He pulled his shirt off the ground and buttoned it.

"Don't tell me I don't have self control." He muttered, pushing the blood stained cotton balls into the trash. I took a breath and opened my mouth to say something, but he spoke again quickly. "Kiista will go into foster care if I told the police. It'll only be two more years until I'm out of there, and I can fill out the forms to take her with me. I don't care what happens to my body, as long as I keep her safe."

A silence fell over us as he wrapped the bandages on his wrists. When he was done he washed the sink from the blood and rolled down his sleeves. He looked at his reflection when he was done, obviously collecting his thoughts.

"I know know why you change in the bathrooms for gym now." I said with a chuckle, and watched him smile. It was a small smile, but real. There was a small pause.

"Will you ignore this?"

"No." My voice was stoic again, a bit frustrated with his request. He nodded, understanding why I was doing it. He stood up strait, pulling his bag off the floor. "Now, you need to sleep. And probably take tomorrow off from school. You can have some money for gas so you can drive your sister to school, and also pick her up the costume she wanted for Halloween."

I opened the door and walked into the cold room, looking around for my wallet.

"Johan, don't worry about it. I have money, and I'll be fine." He said, walking out after me. Both of our voices got much quieter, being careful to not wake the sleeping girl.

"Take it." I said and shoved 30 dollars into his hand. He sighed and nodded.

We both got comfortable, him in my bed, and myself on the floor. I had homework, but I honestly didn't care. I was emotionally and physically drained from that day, and as soon as my head hit the pillow, I feel asleep.

**A/N2: So, uh, yeah. Kiista is Greenland, just so everyone is clear. I just want to say how sorry I am for not updating. This was a very dark chapter, and I'm sorry. I just couldn't help it.**

**Uh... don't hold your breath for the next chapter?**

**Love me please.**


	6. Practice

**A/N: Um, hi? I hope you see this soon. I'm actually thinking about making a writing schedule. Like, write this story at 8:00, and finish each chapter by the next Sunday. I think it would be a good idea, but yeah, it might not work.**

**So, at the end of this chapter I'll tell you what I've sorted out.**

**Well, now onto the story, it's now in Maddie's perspective. I did in fact skip an entire day from her world, and now it's the day after where we left off, and in class.**

**Enjoy!**

I sat on the floor of the classroom, watching Ms. Thrussell talk to the class. I paid little to no attention, because I knew what we were doing that day. I wrote it on the board after she asked, but soon after, a student erased it. At this point, I had stopped caring when people ruined what I did.

When everyone stood, I just followed to where I was supposed to go. Apparently we were learning to dance, as there was a scene in the up-coming play we were preforming that required everyone to dance.

Everybody flocked to their best friend for a dancing partner, leaving me to stand in the back, alone. Yes, there was other people left out, but they quickly paired with each other. I sighed and leaned against the back wall. I simply listened to Thrussell talk about what you're supposed to do.

It was entertaining to watch all of the teenagers trip over their own uncoordinated feet. I chuckled to myself, as no one would see me in the back anyway.

I sunk into a ball in the corner of the choir class, knowing it wouldn't matter, and pulled out my sketch book.

I was slowly working on my drawing skill. I wasn't amazing, or the best artist in the school, but my skill surpassed the average third grader. I was proud of myself just for that.

As soon as I my pencil hit the paper to work on a drawing of a couple, I felt a horrible stabbing pain of a girl in high heels stepping on my foot.

I looked down after she had walked away, without noticing me. My foot had a reasonably sized cut, and a bruise already forming.

I pulled myself up and gingerly walked up to the teacher.

"Excuse me?" I said, trying to be louder than the stereo right by me. I tried again when she didn't hear me. I grew frustrated and place my hand on her shoulder to get her attention. I watched her jump and turn around.

"Oh, my. You're freezing!" She said, a bit shocked. "Um... what was your name again?"

"Madelyn." I said, perturbed because she had already asked me that question that day. Twice.

"Ah, yes, Madelyn. What seems to be the matter?" She asked, not even turning down the music. She did lean in so she could hear my quiet voice.

"A girl stepped on my foot and it's bleeding." I just wanted to get to the nurse.

"You know that I want all girls dancing with guys." She said, with a hint of scolding in my voice.

"I wasn't dancing with her. She just backed up to far and stabbed my foot with her heel." My voice held the same casual tone as we spoke,

It took a few more minutes to convince her to let me limp to the nurses office which was down a set of stairs and to the left.

When I walked into the nurse's office, my eyes fell on a set of three boys in the gym uniforms. I looked at them and saw they were all disheveled, and the dark one had a large bruise on his face.

"David?" I asked out loud as I recognized the dark, slightly curly hair. His gaze shot up from the floor with an alarmed expression. It looked like there was a cut on his forehead that had just stopped bleeding.

I looked at the other two, much lighter guys sitting next to him. I recognized Mathias, he was on the hockey team, who was completely uninjured.

The last kid was staring at me blankly. He was about as big as Matt, with hair just as blonde. I looked at him, and my head had started throbbing. It was like every other time..

"Maddie!" I heard David say loudly, but I couldn't make anything else out, except for what maybe felt like someone picking me up off the ground and some female talking.

My headache slowly subsided and I was able to open my eyes. I found myself staring at the ceiling, laying down in the section of the nurses office meant for people who faint, or people who just had head injuries.

I sat up and soon clutched my head again out of dizziness. When the gray covering my vision subsided, I slowly stood up and looked down. My foot had some gauze taped to it, covering the cut I'd gotten earlier.

"You're awake." I heard the female voice from earlier say. I watched the nurse walk in through the door. "I saw why you'd come to the office and did it up for you." She said, nodding at my foot.

"Thank you." I muttered and looked up at the time, seeing that I had been out of it for almost an entire period. "I should be getting to class."

"I called your mother and she had told me that you have frequent migraines and faint from them often." She said, completely ignoring my past statement. I nodded, as I had been fainting at the house after I remembered certain things. It made no sense. "Well, we'd like to ask if you need help with something. I mean, fainting is a serious problem and we want to make sure all of our students are perfectly fine."

"Yes, I'm perfectly fine. I've talked to a doctor about my migraines and have prescription pain medication that I take at home." I said and watched her nod. "I'm assuming my mother gave the okay for me to take some of the medication I have checked into your office." I saw her nod again.

I soon followed her into the room where everyone's pills were kept, and took the amount she gave me without water.

I soon got a pass to my fourth hour, as the bell had rung while she was finding my pain killers. When I got to the class Ms. Kingsly simply went "Are you in my class?" I sighed and showed her the pass before taking my seat in the back of the class.

We were to work out of the book and study for the upcoming test, but I knew I didn't need to study in class. My mother would make me study when I got home, like she'd always done.

"Did you hear about the fight that happened in second period?" I heard a girl say nearby. It was two Asian girls who were pretending to study.

"No, I was in Choir." The second girl said. I leaned back in my chair, trying to hear better over the loud classroom.

"I was there!" The first girl said. I think her name was Tai. "Two boys got in a fight, and another guy tried to break them up!"  
>"Who was it?" The other one asked. It became apparent that the second girl was actually a very feminine guy.<p>

"It was a guy named Jasper and he was seriously pissed at the kid he was beating up. He was called David." I was surprised that David had just let him do that. I also remembered I saw bruises on the orange eyed kid.

It was giving me a headache to just think about him.

"Who won?" The guy asked. I continued listening out of curiosity.

"I don't quite know. They were both pretty bloody afterward and the third kid broke them up before anything too serious happened." Tai said, and then chuckled. I personally didn't see what was so funny. "The teacher brought all three to the office, and they went to the nurse because they were both bleeding too bad."

"Do you think they'll be suspended?"

"Probably not. I mean, it's so close to that weird standardized test that are happening on Halloween."

I hoped she was right when she said they wouldn't be suspended.

I rubbed my face, knowing that I would have to talk to David later. It was frustrating beyond belief.

**ΞΞΞTIMESKIPΞΞΞ**

"He just hit me! I only hit him back out of self defense!" David insisted, trying to get people to stop staring at his bruised face by sitting in the corner with me.

"What I heard was you were _both_ bloody and beat up." I said, raising my eyebrow. I didn't blame him for the snort he produced, because I knew my stern tone didn't mix with the quietness of my voice.

"I got mad, okay?" He said, trying to finish the conversation.

"Since when do you have anger management problems?" I asked, and he frowned at me.

"Leave it, Maddie."

"I want to know what happened."

"Just ask the kid on your hockey team, Matt was his name, right?" He didn't even want to do work, he just wanted to get off the subject.

"No. I want to know from you."

"Madelyn." He nearly growled. It almost scared me, and I shrunk into my seat. "This is something I'd like to keep to myself, and I would like you to _respect it_." He put extra emphasis on the last two words, making it sound very much like and order.

I was genuinely scared this time, and simply squeaked in response.

There was an uncomfortable silence between us for almost 20 minutes. I worked so I wouldn't have to sit awkwardly.

"Hey you guys?" I looked up at the English teacher we had, Ms. Scriven. She was an extremely quiet person, almost like me. "You seem quieter than usual." She knew her class would always be loud, and she wondered what was wrong when anyone was quiet.

"It's just a conversation break. Nothing to worry about." David said and she nodded and went around to try to talk to the class.

"Sorry for pushing it." I said and he chuckled.

"Don't worry. I was just a little upset. Let's just look past it."

"If that was 'just a little upset', I'd hate to see you angry." I said and both of us laughed. "Do you end up like the Hulk?"

"Yes, but I turn into a huge banana and sexually harass people." He said and I laughed again.

It didn't take long for the bell to ring. The class rushed out and we followed loosely being them.

"Do you have hockey today?" He asked as we headed to my locker. I nodded as I opened it and my bag fell out onto my feet. I had washed my equipment the day before, and couldn't get into the hockey rink that morning to put it in the locker room. "Do you need a ride?" He asked as I pulled the large gym bag up onto my shoulder.

"Nah. Al is going to drive me." I said as I was started to tip over from the weight of the bag. David caught me as I stumbled and our faces got awkwardly close together.

I saw the blood rush into his face, and felt it happening to me. He was just so close... I could see the rippling pattern in his brown eyes, and felt my heart jump into my throat. He quickly let go of me and we stepped very far away from each other.

"Let's ignore that." He said and I nodded quickly before we walked down the stairs nearby.

I heard Gilbert's loud and exuberant voice in the same stairwell and started hurrying down.

"Hey!" He said, sounding excited. "We were looking for you." He said and gestured to Mathias.

I saw him glance over my shoulder at David and nod. I was glad they didn't hate each other after what had happened, even though Matt obviously wasn't in the fight.

We all walked to the hockey rink and David said his goodbyes. He needed to pick up his little sister from school.

"So.." Gilbert said with a visible smirk. "What were you and David doing up there?" He nudged my shoulder, which was more like a push, because of how small I was.

"My stuff spilled out of my bag." I said with an even tone. His expression fell and he rolled his eyes.

We each went into the locker rooms to change into our clothing we warm up in.

The door closed behind me and I exhaled slowly. The cold air felt amazing on my skin as I walked to the locker assigned for me.

I slowly undressed and looked down at my bandages. They weren't bloody and you wouldn't be able to see them through my leggings. I did end up unwrapping them and tightening them a bit so they wouldn't fall down.

I quickly pulled on my leggings and unbuttoned my top. It was gone with my bra and I quickly was covered again by my sports bra.

The door creaked open and I nearly yelled out of surprise.

"Maddie!" I heard Matt yell.

"I'm not decent!" I yelled back and heard the door creak shut, but not close.

"We need you in the field now!" He sounded annoyed. I grabbed my black t-shirt and shoes from the bag and ran to the door, turning it the shirt side out while opening the door. I didn't have a problem with them seeing me in a sports bra. I went to the pool with them all the time.

"What's wrong?" I asked as I hadn't gotten a rude removal from the locker room in a while.

"You were taking too long for coach." Matt said as we walked quickly through the hall. I rolled my eyes and pushed my shoes into his hands so I could pull the shirt over my head. "You don't have to be so pushy." He muttered as he pulled the folded socks out of one of the shoes.

I grabbed the socks and hopped along on each foot while putting the socks on. He opened the door for me and I pulled my shoes on in the same fashion.

Both of us ran across the grass to the group of standing guys. I could see the frustrated expression of Coach as I appeared.

"Sorry! I was having trouble with my leggings." I lied.

"If you're late one more time you get to do laps." He said and I mocked fear. He rolled his eyes and I crouched down to tie my shoes. "So, we're a month away from our game with Silverhill, and we need to get ready. I want each of you to come to every single meet, even if your mom says 'no, if you don't clean your room, I will.' Let her clean your room! I think she should know the nasty things you're into."

A collective chuckle came from the team and the coach talked for about five more minutes before we did warm ups.

Several people who were waiting for their ride in front of the school stared at us, as we were running in near freezing weather. After the warm up we walked inside and got into our equipment.

This time I pulled my bag out to change with the guys right next to the rink so I wouldn't do it too slowly. I also needed help lifting the shoulder pads up far enough to get in them.

"If you're so little, why do you even play hockey?" I heard Ivan after I had to ask for help with my jersey too.

"I'm fast. Also, It helps release several anger problems I have. Or at least, anger problems my mom says I have." I said and heard several boys chuckle. I was the only girl on the team, and I honestly wasn't the best, even if most of the boys said I was.

I flash of orange running down the stairs caught my attention. I looked up to see Anastasia walking quickly towards us. She was a cheerleader of sorts. Mostly she just helped with paperwork and bought us snacks.

"I'm sorry I'm so late! I forgot to bring food so I had to run to the store and then I started walking home and had to run all the way back!" She said, all in one breath. She dropped her orange bag into a seat.

"Are you sure it wasn't a boy?" I heard Tino say from the back of the crowd of boys. There were only nine of us, which was a bit disappointing. There was Ivan, Gilbert, Aske, Fredrick, Mathias, Berwald, James, Tino, and myself.

"Yes, I'm sure it wasn't a boy." She said, but with a little more red in her cheeks. I chuckled as I plopped down into a chair to put on my skates.

"I want everyone on the ice." Coach said, and a sense of rush struck all of the members that were still getting dressed.

**ЖЖЖJASPER'S POVЖЖЖ**

"What were you thinking?!" My father practically yelled in my face.

"I was thinking I was _pissed_!" I wasn't yelling, but I was damn near close.

"That is not an excuse for getting in a fight!" He exclaimed, obviously frustrated.

"Then how come you and Mom broke up?" I asked, and watched him grow furious. He reached out and slapped me. The crack rang out through the back room and I bit my lip, knowing I shouldn't have done that.

He didn't even say anything as he turned around to leave the room.

"Go and do you work in the kitchen. I leaving to get medicine for me and Bella. Also, Henri's getting a cough." He muttered before walking out the door and slamming it behind him.

I sighed and sunk to the ground, holding my head.

It just _happened._ I didn't mean to lash out at the kid, he had just insulted me and it really struck a nerve. If dad had known what he said he would have probably hit him too.

"_Maybe if you didn't do as many drugs, you might have some skill in playing football."_

"I don't do drugs.. I don't know why everyone assumes I do." I muttered to myself.

I stood up, forcing myself not to yell and punch a wall or something.

When I walked back into the kitchen, I found Henri wearing a face mask like the other two in the house.

"You want me to make soup later?" I asked and saw him nod as he was putting a pan of brownies in the oven.

Both of us worked in the kitchen until 8. He walked to his room so I was left to clean up the kitchen and the front room.

When I was done I want back to count up the money in the register and make soup for all of my family to eat tomorrow.

After I was done with the trivial work, I looked out of the shop and onto the street. I was starting to get a sinking feeling in my chest that I couldn't quite place.

My feet carried me to the door and onto the street as if they were acting on their own will.

I walked down the street and found myself walking to the bridge. I felt uneasy about coming back all the way to where I'd seen a girl jump off a bridge.

When I got there I noticed the chain link fencing was taller than before. I guess it's a safety precaution.

I sat down, staring at the dark sky. It was obviously cloudy, as the light of the moon was skewed by the clouds.

"Hey, kid." I jumped as I heard a voice from next to me. I turned around to see a cop car, and a man hanging out the window. "What're you doing our here so late?" He asked, not acting like I was a threat, but he was merely curious.

"I lost a friend here." I said, only partly lying. I got up and brushed myself off. "I should really head home."

"Do you need a ride?" He asked, noticing both of us had clouds coming from our breath.

"Sure." I muttered and got in the back. We were silent for most of the ride.

"So, you were friends with the missing girl?" He asked. The girl that jumped off the bridge was a strange anomaly for everyone on the police force. There were no reports of missing children, and there was no body found in the lake downstream. There were things like a shoe and a torn beaded necklace recovered, but those were common things to find.

"Yeah. I mean, I knew her, but she wasn't my friend." I said and continued to stare out the window.

"So, she was like a friend of a friend?" He asked and I agreed quietly.

We were at the bakery quickly and I got out. I waved to the officer and walked back in, feeling the air conditioning hit me like a wall.

It needed to be that way because of the cakes. Also, it kept bugs from flying in.

I heard a groan from my father's room, but ignored it as I walked upstairs.

Showering wasn't something I honestly cared about until morning, so I simply flopped onto my bed and slept.

**A/N: So, um, yeah. As a hint to all those names listed on the hockey team, It's Prussia, Russia, all five Nordics, Antarctica, and Maddie.**

**I felt like making Antarctica a character. He's cool.**

**So, sorry about the boring chapter, I just want to tell you things will pick up soon. Like, _really_ pick up. Also, um, yeah, there's a romance between David and Maddie because reasons.**

**Those reasons are mostly, "They're both completely ignored countries! It's not logical, but it's cute."**

**The former was taken from a conversation with my friend.**

**Finally, the schedule is to update every other Tuesday. Because I felt like it. This is also subject to change.**

**Please review, it makes me happy.**


	7. Figure it Out

**A/N: In all honesty, I spent the most of these two weeks mapping out the city and school. It's weird, I know. And it was actually less than half a week, so the chapter is still quality.**

**But, anyway, as you can tell, it's getting close to Halloween in this story, and that will be incredibly fun.**

**I've also noticed something. I see that a bunch of people are reading, and continuing to read, but nobody is reviewing. I mean, I'm not mad, but I really do like hearing feedback, especially if it's constructive criticism. So, uh, yeah.**

**There's a part in the story which is particularly angsty (Well, this story is mostly teen angst anyway.) , because having Antarctica fight with Ecuador is just plain _fun_. Think about it, extreme cold, versus extreme hot. **

**Well, let's start in Maddie's perspective.**

I sighed as I watched a blonde guy walk up to the teacher with a pink slip of paper. I recognized him as one of the three kids that gathered in the woods after school. He and a guy with red eyes accompany Aske after practice sometimes.

I stared at him as he talked to the teacher, noticing something odd about him. I couldn't place it, but there was a compelling urge in me to get to know him.

He wasn't particularly attractive, as his eyebrows took up at least half of his forehead, and nothing about him stood out, so I couldn't quite place the feeling.

Shaking my head, I looked back down at my notes. The doodles along the sides of the paper were far more entertaining than the actual work, so I simply continued coloring them in with the multicolored pens I had in a pencil bag.

As I was halfway through coloring in the bark of a cartoon tree, a chill ran own my back, forcing me to sit up strait. I looked around and watched the guy plop down at the desk opposite of mine. He stared at me intently, seeming as if he expected me to say something.

When he found that I wasn't going to do anything to start a conversation, he took it upon himself.

"You feel weird." He said promptly. I furrowed my brow in confusion, as he hadn't touched me. Both of us stared for a bit before I grew too confused at what he had said.

"What?" I said, starting to feel a bit paranoid. He had been staring at me for a while and had gotten to me.

"Your energy. It's not right." He muttered, making his English accent clear. He saw that I was only more confused and he sighed in frustration. "I'm Arthur." He said. I felt more comfortable with that type of conversation that what he was trying to start before.

"Madelyn." I said and looked back down at my paper. Before I even set the brown pen to the paper, I felt his gaze on me. "What do you want?"

"I'm confused."

"Well, I'm confused as to why you chose here in the entire class to sit." I said, gesturing at the table that was empty except for us.

"The quietest place." He said and dug through his bag for several books. He set them on his desk in an arrangement similar to mine: a science book on the right,a notebook full of notes in front of him, and a smaller book on top of that, which looked like it was mostly full of drawings.

"Well, it's a pleasure to meet you." I said, trying to hide my sarcasm. Both of us were quiet for almost ten minutes before I looked up and saw what he was drawing.

The writing looked as if it was in runes, and the pictures seemed to be sprawling across the paper by themselves. I stared, fascinated for a while, as he flipped back through the book to look at other drawings.

"You don't have many friends, do you?" I asked out of the blue, still fixed on the drawings.

"No, why?" He asked without looking up from his book.

"You chose to sit with me, and you aren't exactly worried about me looking at your book." I muttered and he looked up at me.

"What do you mean?" He asked, suddenly apprehensive. All I did was glace at his book. "You aren't able to see what I'm doing, are you?" I pursed my lips and suddenly felt bad about pointing it out. "Bloody hell." He muttered.

"Sorry..." I muttered back, feeling bad for absolutely no reason. "I mean, if it helps, I don't think you're weird."

"Are you going to tell anyone about this?" He asked, closing the book, I heard a hiss come from it and was a bit scared.

"No?" I was pressed into the back of my chair. Silence fell with me glancing at my own page and trying to concentrate on the actual writing.

"I'm in the Magic Club." He said. "I think you know Aske." I nodded and he explained that he knew about the hockey team.

Silence fell again and I stared at my notes. I felt him staring at me and started to get worried. I felt my heart race and my breaths became shallow. I started coughing and felt sick to my stomach. It felt like a cloud had surrounded me and it was increasingly hard to breath.

I stood up and walked to the teacher. I got permission to leave the class and almost ran out. I had the feeling someone was staring at me as I left.

I pushed open the bathroom and ran to a stall. After a few heaves, I watched my breakfast come up, and I kept retching even after my stomach was completely empty.

After I was done being sick, I stood up and flushed the toilet. I leaned against the wall and breathed the cool air.

My head started to hurt, but I tried my best to push it off.

"Are you okay in there?" I heard a timid voice ask from somewhere else in the bathroom.

"Yeah." I muttered. "I'm just feeling a bit off." Silence followed, and the door to the bathroom closed.

I opened the stall and walked out to the mirrors. I looked at my shaking and disheveled reflection before brushing my hands over my head to flatten the hairs that were sticking up.

I splashed my face with water and dried it with my blazer. I took a drink from the drinking fountain before walking slowly back to the classroom.

As soon as I walked in, I saw Arthur staring at me. His eyes seemed to be almost glowing. I looked at the ground and walked back to my seat. The feeling of being pushed on all sides returned, and I tried my hardest to shake it.

"What was that?" I heard him ask. I glanced at the clock in an attempt to look anywhere but him. The bell was about to ring.

"I felt sick." I muttered and started packing up my things. I started coughing again as I stood up straight. I had an horribly uncomfortable feeling whenever I looked at the guy, contrary of what I had felt in the beginning of the period.

"You're so... strange." He said and I started stepping away. "Are you-"

The bell cut him off and I walked out of the class as quick as I could. The students all stood up as soon as they could and formed a crowd at the door.

I walked quickly up the stairs and to through the quickly filling halls.

Pain flooded my shoulder as I was pushed into a locker by a red haired boy. I brushed it off quickly and started moving to the cafeteria.

The school was set up in one of the most confusing ways. Both the cafeteria and the gymnasium were on the second floor, and most other classrooms are on the first or third.

I pushed my way through the sides of the hall and into the huge cafeteria. I found the rectangular table by the windows that I always sat at.

It didn't take long for David to plop down in front of me, and the rest of the friend group to follow suit.

"So, I grabbed him and pushed him into the locker." I heard Gilbert say enthusiastically, obviously finishing the story he was telling to Ivan.

"You know, he could report you." I heard Tino mutter from the end of the table, which started a long conversation between those three.

"Do you think they'll ever shut up?" David asked with a chuckle. I looked at everyone at the table and furrowed my brow.

"Where's Matt?" I asked, looking at everyone.

"Well, _fine_. Disregard what I say." He said sarcastically.

"Where is he?" I questioned, a little but angry that he hadn't answered me the first time. He heard the anger in my voice and got slightly defensive.

"He's off with his friend and your brother." He said, looking a bit spiteful.

"Which friend?"

"The one I beat up." He said into his sandwich.

"We both know it was a tie." I said and watched him roll his eyes.

I thought for a few moments while David was engaging in a short conversation.

"Who is this guy?" I asked and watched his shoulders tighten.

"His name's Jasper. He's friends with Matt and some other kids." He grumbled.

"Who? Jasper?" Gilbert asked, completely ignoring Tino. Both of us nodded. "Oh! He's pretty cool. I mean, he's a little whacked out, but still pretty cool. His family runs a bakery, and he decorates most everything there."

I nodded, quite fascinated. I knew he worked at the bakery, but it hurt my head to try to think about that place.

"Da, he's quite responsible." Ivan said with a smile. "He's in a few of my classes, and he always has his homework in on time."

"Responsible my _ass_." David grumbled and and all of the table looked at him. "Hey! I've never seen any of this. I only see a pretty frustrating guy who argues about the validity of sports rules."

"David, be quiet." James said. It was the first thing he said all lunch. He was a man of few words, so when he said something, everyone listened. I watched David sigh and lean back in the chair. "Yes, Jasper can be rash and frustrating, but he is also a very kind person. Currently his entire family is sick, and he's still doing homework and running the shop. He's also picking up the homework for both of his siblings. David, you can't complain about how he's so bad. You wouldn't even do that for your family."

"_Excuse me?_" David said, sitting forward in his chair to look around Gilbert to James. "Do you even know how much work I do for my family?" Gilbert leaned as far back in his chair as possible so he wouldn't be in the direct line of the argument.

None of us tried to stop either of them, as arguments resolved themselves quickly. It was also incredibly entertaining.

"You pick up your little sister. Yeah, I know. You've had to beg me for gas money five times in the last month." James crossed his arms as he leaned forward to look at David.

"Maybe that's because you're the son of two scientists and are always loaded with cash. It's a shame you never earned it through hard work, though. You just sit there and let your parents shower you in money." David said. I was starting to doubt that the argument would resolve itself.

"Oh! You're here to preach about _hard work_? Do you even know how to use that phrase?"

"Yes, I do. Hard work is actually _working_ on a farm after school, instead of hiding in my room behind a computer every night."

I saw rage flare in James' eyes at that comment. Part of me knew that this argument would come up sometime. I could tell from the the three other boys' expressions that they did too.

"And what gives you the right to insult me when all you do is take care of alpacas. You wouldn't have the brains to do what I do every day!" James said, making David just as mad. Both of them stood up at almost the same time.

"Do you want a fight?" David asked menacingly, "Because those are some pretty heavy words you're throwing around."

"You couldn't even scratch me."

"Wanna bet?"

"How about no!" Gilbert said as he stood up between the two guys. "You could get suspended if you _actually_ fought. And that just wouldn't be awesome, now would it?"

"Shut up." James said, and I stood up as well. He rarely got this angry, and I knew that someone would get hurt. I walked around the end of the table and grabbed James shoulders. I pushed him into his seat and did the same with David before sitting back down.

"Both of you need to calm down." I said and glared at both of them. "It was entertaining for a bit, but I would like to have all of my friends in one piece."

"Yeah. You guys need to chill." Tino said. "And anyway, James, how did you know about Jasper's home life?"

"I listen to what people say." He said and went back to his food.

The four of them took up a conversation about eavesdropping as I stared at David.

"What do you want?" He asked.

"You're on your man period." I said and he chuckled.

"Yeah, there's a bunch of llamas that are going to give birth soon, and it's been hectic around the farm." He sighed. He always got irritable when he was stressed.

His family owned an alpaca and llama ranch and he did a lot of the work.

"Ah." I said shortly and we fell silent. I found an uncanny interest in the hem of my blazer sleeve. I fiddled with it for a while before David started talking again.

"You didn't bring lunch." He said and I nodded. I heard him groan and looked up. "Why don't you ever bring lunch?"

"I'm not hungry?" I said with an innocent smile. He sighed and pushed the last of his sandwich into my hands.

"If it weren't for me, you would have starved to death by now." He said and I smiled.

_Maybe that's what I want._

**ЖЖЖJASPER'S POVЖЖЖ**

"Well, I don't see why we _have_ to be there on time." Mathias said with a grin. I rolled my eyes and walked through the crowded halls. The bell to excuse lunch had just rung, but kids still wanted to sit around and enjoy the laziness of eating. Because of this, it was hard to get through the halls.

"Because reasons." I said and heard him chuckle.

The third floor was surprisingly clear of students and we managed to get into the math classroom quickly.

A few students were in there already, but we found out assigned seats quickly. Francis was already sitting there, and looked up at us.

"You two are early." He said, surprised. Even though I'd heard him talk for two years, I still had to control my laughter at his accent.

"Yeah. He saw the time before the bell rung." Mathias responded, obviously trying to hold back the same laughter as me.

A loud group of kids walked through the door, making it hard to talk and hear each other. I stared at the door and watched a blonde kid walk in and recognized him vaguely.

"Hey, Francis?" I asked as I stared at the guy.

"Oui?" He muttered.

"Is that the guy you're trying to get it on with?" I asked. It was common knowledge that Francis liked both girls and guys. It was also perfectly normal.

He looked up quickly and spun in his chair too look around the room.

"Arthur?" Francis asked, sounding a little bit too excited,  
>"Yeah. He's talking to Hartwell." I said so he would know where to look. I saw the grin spread across his face and started to think that pointing him out might have been a mistake.<p>

All three of us watched Arthur talk to the teacher and waited for him to consult the seating chart.

There was about three open seats in the room, including the one at our table.

After about 10 seconds the kid turned around to walk to look where he was to sit. His expression fell and Matt started to chuckle.

"What?" I asked and he simply shook his head.

A few moments later, Arthur plopped down in the desk next to Francis. The Frenchman was about to open his mouth when he was cut off.

"Don't even think about it." Arthur muttered and looked at both me and Matt. "I'm Arthur Kirkland, and I'm sure _he_ already told you about me." He pointed at Francis while he was talking.

The bell rang before any of us could talk any more, and Hartwell started instructing the class.

I sighed and stared at the page numbers we were supposed to study. I tried to flip to the correct page, only to find I read the number wrong.

"Hey, Johan." Matt said and I nodded. "It's page 394." I nodded again and flipped through the huge book. After about thirty seconds I was lost. "Dude, 394."

Eventually he just took it upon himself to turn to the page for me.

I started reading slowly to recall what I remembered of this subject. We were studying for an upcoming standardized test which would take all day.

"So there was this girl today." I found myself eavesdropping on Francis and Arthur's conversation. Francis groaned, obviously not wanting to hear if Arthur was interested in girls. "No! You need to hear this! She had this incredibly cold and soft energy, it was so... strange." Francis was trying his hardest to stay engaged. "She felt like she _knew._"

"You Limeys are so strange.." Francis muttered

"Hey!"

"What do you mean, she 'knew'?" I asked, stopping the impending argument. Mathias glanced up from his paper watching the three of us interact.

"Artie here is in the Magic club." Francis said, scratching his scraggly beard. Arthur tried to shush him but couldn't keep him from continuing. "He thinks he can sense the 'energies' of the people around him. Oh, and he sees dead people."

"Will you stop!" Arthur was extremely frustrated and looked like he was going to yell.

"Well, I trust these guys." Francis said and Arthur sighed.

"One of my good friends is in your club." Matt said quietly. "I think you're perfectly normal, and actually pretty cool for being able to do magic." I nodded in agreement and the other two looked at us.

"Well, that's different." Arthur muttered. "And I don't _see_ ghosts. I sense them." Francis rolled his eyes in response.

"Makes sense, but what about the girl you were talking about earlier?" I honestly just learned not to care about particularly strange things, like magic.

It was an eclectic school.

"She said her name was Madelyn." He said and my heart jumped into my throat. I nodded quickly and urged him to continue. "You'd know her." He looked at Matt and he simply shrugged.

"She has purple eyes and freckles and these red triangle hair clips!" I said and he nodded quickly.

"She ran out of the classroom because she was feeling sick." He said. "When she came back she looked like she was sweating and trying not to make eye contact."

"Every time I see her she practically faints!" I said, getting a bit too excited. "You know what I'm talking about." I said to Matt and he just looked at me like I was crazy. I groaned from frustration and looked back to Arthur.

He wasn't looking at me anymore, but down at a small dark purple notebook on top of his math book. The page looked mostly blank other than what he was currently writing. It was in a dark green ink, and I couldn't read it at all.

I shrugged a bit and made eye contact with an incredibly bored looking Francis.

"I hate math." He muttered. "I would much rather be in my art class." I chuckled and nodded. Each of us worked in silence, and I occasionally nudged Mathias in the arm to ask for clarification on an operation.

"So, what are each of you doing for Halloween?" I looked up to see Gilbert, the resident albino. "The awesome me is going out for pranks. You want to-"

"I have to walk my sister around to trick or treat. I don't want to come." Matt said, not looking up from his paper once.

"Well _fine_." Gilbert muttered.

"I think my sister will be okay this year." Francis said with a smirk. "Artie do you want to-"

"Busy." He muttered. I looked at the two guys that were sucked into their work and chuckled a bit. Francis frowned as he looked at me.

"The family is sick. I'll be giving out candy for kids." I said and watched both of them frown. "I have a bunch of eggs that went bad. You can have them." They both brightened up and I rolled my eyes.

They chattered for a bit before I started thinking.

_Would the girl be out and about? I mean, she's old, but maybe she has a younger sibling or something. I might be able to talk to her, or maybe just see her for longer than a second._ I thought.

"Gilbert?" I asked. They both looked at me. "I need to ask you something."

"Shoot."

"Well, you probably know her, but I want to know if you know if this girl is going to be out and around on Halloween. Her name's Madelyn." I said and watched his face pull into a confused expression.

"I've never heard of her." He said. It took a bit for the two of them to start talking again and I simply stared blankly.

Before long, the rhythmic bell rung and I quickly stuffed my books away.

"Hey, Arthur." I grabbed his shoulder as we walked out the door. "I need to you get me information on Madelyn." He nodded. "I mean, where does she live, what her schedule is, and why no one remembers her."

"It sounds to me like you're stalking the girl." He said and paused. A look of realization flooded his face. "Wait, nobody remembers her?"

"No. I know for a fact that Matt and Gilbert know her. They're on the hockey team with her, but every time I describe her, or say her name they just act like I'm crazy." He stopped in the center of the hall to look at me. I was considerably taller, so it was a bit awkward.

"I'll figure this out." He muttered and practically scampered down the hall.

I looked around the hall and started walking, trying not to look especially unstable.

"You better figure this out." I mumbled to myself.

**A/N: Well, I was going to say something, but I can't remember now.**

**I hope you enjoyed this, and have a good day or night or whatever you're doing right now.**


	8. Silence is Golden

**A/N: So, uh, hi, Just wanted to say what's up before the chapter, so uh yeah.**

**Sorry for being kind of a review beggar lately, I just want to know what people think about what happens, and how I can improve. I mean, I know you guys like it, because you're reading it. I see that in the stats.**

**So, um, I'll just get on with the story. It's Maddie's POV at hockey practice.**

My legs were swinging back and forth on the bench as I stared up at the high ceiling. I wondered what happened to the pucks we launch up there every so often. Coach was giving everyone a pep talk while we got out of our padding. I personally loved the cold of the room, but Anastázia was wrapped in a blanket.

"Where's Aske?" Coach said, abruptly interrupting his own speech. We all looked at him strangely.

"Coach, he hasn't been at practice at all." Anastázia said quietly. Tino and I nodded in agreement.

"I could have sworn... well, tell him he needs to come next time." He muttered.

"Coach." I said with my hand raised. It was a habit of mine. "Can I bring Kumajiro on Tuesday?" I asked and saw he was confused. "My pet polar bear."

"Ah!" He said with sudden realization. "Of course. Just hand him to me at the beginning of the day."

As the coach and I talked, the rest of the team started to chatter as the put away their gear. We all knew we were dismissed without having to ask. I found a banana pushed into my hand by Anastázia, and she was leaning over me to hand more fruit to everyone else. I liked to think of her as our den mother.

I did have to push my body back in the seat so I wouldn't be suffocated by her.. chest.. area. I turned my head to see Gilbert looking at me with a slightly jealous expression.

I smirked at him and his face reddened before looking away quickly.

"Berwald, Tino, need a ride?" He said and the three of them quickly left, not even saying goodbye.

I shrugged and stood up myself. Matt looked up at me.

"Need a ride?" He repeated, as that was all the conversation to be made.

"If I'm still waiting for Al by the time you get out there, you can drive me." I said and pulled my hoodie on over my black t-shirt. I slid my tennis shoes on as well.

I grabbed my gym bag from the seat behind me and slowly made my way out of the seats. The remainder of the hockey team waved as I walked out the door.

I let my legs to carry me to another bench to sit on. I looked at the clouded over sky and wondered if the kids would be out for Halloween, because the last two years there were sleet storms.

The parking lot was more empty than usual, and I could easily see across it to the wooded area beyond the hockey building.

I saw a blonde guy standing against a tree. A strange shimmering was flitting around him, as well as a greenish fog. I squinted and leaned forward a bit, as if it helped me see.

I shrugged my bags off my shoulders and stood. My feet moved forward slowly as I was staring at the guy.

The guy eventually looked exactly like Aske. My pace quickened to a jog, not worrying about the bags I'd left, even though my phone and wallet were in them.

"Aske!" I said loudly as I jogged over. "Coach was looking for you!"

Instead of responding, or even looking over, I saw him turn and sort of roll off of the tree and into the woods.

I moved faster, curious as to what was happening. I didn't understand why he was running away like that.

As soon as I took a step into the forest, I felt cold. Not as if I caught a cold draft, but it was as if something cold was pressing on me from all sides, seeming to make little use of my hoodie.

My shivering didn't stop my curiosity and I pressed through the trees. I caught sight of Aske through the trees and lengthened my stride even more.

I lost him for several seconds before nearly ramming into a chain link fence. I looked around, a bit confused, before pushing my shoe into one of the holes and climbing over.

Before long I saw him again. He stopped extremely far away, so I slowed down, knowing I'd catch him eventually.

Pain seared from my shoulders as I felt something hit me hard. It felt like a large baseball bat, but something that big couldn't exist. I was forced forward by the blow, and fell onto my hands and knees.

I looked up to see Aske's feet in front of my face. I blinked hard and looked up to see three guys, whose eyes all seemed to glow. I reached up to rub my face, but my arm was grabbed.

Darkness cloaked my eyes quickly, and I felt a string tighten around my neck.

I started breaking quickly, as I was terrified. Another hand grabbed my other arm and I was pulled off the ground.

"I'm sorry, whatever I did!" I said in a panicked voice. I hadn't meant to say it, but it had just slipped out.

Without warning, I felt another hit. This time it was to my head and it made me slip into unconsciousness.

Reality became horribly fuzzy and pieced apart. I had the feeling of being lifted over a shoulder. I heard male voices talking, but I couldn't make out the words.

I fell unconscious completely for what felt like seconds, but was probably many minutes.

The male voices sounded like they were chatting. I couldn't move my body, as limbs felt like lead.

"Is she breathing?" I heard a deep voice ask as I slowly came to.

"What?"

"Her chest isn't moving, and it doesn't look like her heart is beating either."

"Fuck."

I felt a hand on the upper part of my chest that pressed down hard.

"Dragomir? How hard did you hit her?"

"Not _that_ hard!"

I tried to move my head or finger or something to at least do _something_. I also became aware that I was laying on the ground.

My brain sluggishly woke up as I heard the three guys fighting. Sounds and feelings were still so blurred, it was hard to make out the conversation, even when I was I was concentrating.

"Let me through." The voice that said that was more nasal-y than the others. Something pressed on my chest and I heard breathing.

A long pause was followed by the feeling of being lifted, but falling back onto the ground again. A dull pain from the back of my head bothered me before my senses blackened and I passed out.

I started to hear conversation again, but it was drowned out my the sound of running water. It felt like there was still the damn bag on my head, so even if I was able to open my eyes, I would see nothing.

The murmuring went silent for a moment before I was no longer being held by arms anymore. I was suspended by nothing for a moment before being enveloped in cold.

Silence slowly covered me as I felt the strings around my neck loosen. The rough cloth slid off my face smoothly, and in the silence, I opened my eyes to the sky.

The nearly full moon rippled as if everything were covered in water. The coolness seemed to hold me like a mother holds a newborn. It felt like I was staring for an eternity.

I let myself breath in slowly before pain started up in my lungs. I coughed and realized I was trying to breath underwater.

The rushing water around me ripped away the serene moment, and tossed me into a rock.

When I found my head above the water I finally gasped, only to choke on more water covering my head.

My hands found something to hold onto, but it was moving just as quickly down the river as myself. My feet hit rocks painfully as I found that my shoes were gone. I tried to find the river bed, but simply sank lower in the water.

I pushed my hand into my face to check if my glasses were still there, and by a miracle, they were still perched on my nose.

I continued to hold my hand there while trying to swim to my right. My gasps for air were getting increasingly desperate as I stared at the sky. A deep maroon bridge was passing overhead.

Without thinking, I screamed using all of the air in my lungs to try to get someone to notice me.

I got in one successful breath before being plunged underwater again.

Images of the bridge and the sky filled my mind's eye as I was submerged. The cuts in my arm as I hit the bridge's support beams. The orange eyes staring me down.

_I wanted to die, just not like this... why didn't it happen the first time.._

"MADELYN!" I vaguely heard from above the water. I tried to find up as best as I could and swam that way. I hit air and gasped again, swimming to my right as quickly as I could.

I felt someone grab my and and almost pull it out of it's socket from how much force they used to get me out of the water.

I hit the ground hard and rolled onto my side. My body was shaking as I coughed and hacked. I vomited for the second time that day, this time onto the ground. I felt the bag being pulled out of my hand, but didn't care.

"Madelyn." I heard the same voice say. I spit one last time and rolled onto my back. "Maddie, what happened?"

David stared down at me this his bandaged face and I felt slightly relieved. It took a while, bit I slowly got my mouth to work.

"I d-don't even know." I stuttered out. His brow furrowed and I sat up slowly, becoming light headed. "C-care to tell me how y-you got me out?"

"Saw you at the bridge, drove down the road." He said quickly. He squatted in front of me, carefully avoiding the puke. "Madelyn, it's really late. Why were you floating down the river?"

"I don't know!" I said, my speech clearing up quickly. "I'm sorry.." I muttered.

"Don't be." He said and sighed. He pulled out his phone and showed it to me. The time in the corner read 21:37.

"Can you take me home?" I asked pitifully after a long pause. He sighed and agreed before slowly helping me up.

"Maddie, you have ropes on your wrists.." David observed. "Did someone-"

"No." I cut him off. "I'll get them off when I get home."

I stumbled into his car and struggled with buckling myself in. I looked into the back seat to see his sister sleeping soundly.

"Do you need help with that too?" David asked about my seat belt. He was till looking at me with a worried expression. I nodded and he reached across me to grab it and buckle me in.

He paused while in front of me and stared at me for a bit.

"Do you mind if you take off your sweatshirt?" His question startled me and I started to panic. Then I realized that I was waterlogging his passenger seat.

I carefully pulled off my hoodie and rung it out with my hands though the window. I hung most of it out the window while holding onto it while he started the car.

"You need to eat." He said in a quiet tone. "Can I drop off Ximena first?" He asked, referring to his little sister.

"You don't have to get me anything." I said as he pulled off of the beach and onto the road.

"Maddie." He was being extremely serious. "I found you nearly drowning in a river without shoes. You have cuts on your feet legs and arms, and you were clutching onto that black bag." He pointed to it, resting on the dashboard.

I pulled it into my lap and looked at it closely. The drawstring had a flat, golf ball sized pendant attached to it.

"David, I don't know what happened. I saw Aske after hockey practice and wanted to talk to him, but he ran away. I ran after him and then... then it all got so fuzzy..." I said and he glanced over at me with a worried look.

It took a while, but I explained everything, even the serene moment in the river where I didn't know I was drowning.

When I was finished, we were sitting in the parking lot of the supermarket, as he'd already dropped off his sister. David got out of the car and dug around in the trunk for some dry clothes I could wear before he got me home.

He walked up by the side of the car and opened my door.

"C'mon. We're getting you some food." He said. I smiled and slowly stood up. He was actually incredibly sweet, just a little brash sometimes.

The store was almost completely empty, other than workers and one or two young mothers who were trying to get their shopping done while their kid slept in their cart. No one even seemed to mine that I was barefooted.

David shoved the dry clothing into my hands and I chuckled. I walked into the bathrooms at the front of the store.

The room was completely silent, but warm. I felt uncomfortable walking into one of the stalls, but I did eventually.

My clothing was off quickly and it was dripping onto the floor from where it was hanging over the stall door. I took off the sports bra and rung it out quickly before getting dressed. The bandages on my leg were miraculously still tight, even after everything that had happened that day.

As I walked out, I heard David snort.

"What?" I asked as he snickered.

"You just look silly in oversized clothes." He muttered before standing up off the wall. I pouted at him as he walked away, knowing he wouldn't see my face.

We stood in front of the bakery for a while before he turned to me.

"What would you like to eat?" He asked. I simply shrugged and he groaned in frustration. He picked up a box of mini cupcakes and walked quickly to the isles of the store. He grabbed a box of Oreos and walked back to the front of the store to check out at the one cashier.

The red haired man looked like he hated his job, but forced a smile onto his face.

"Good evening. Did you find everything alright?" He asked and we both nodded. It's not like anyone said they didn't find everything.

"Is the Caribou still open?" David asked and the cashier nodded. I looked to see if he was wearing a name tag. He had neglected that part of his uniform. When he was done, David quickly walked to the coffee shop that was inside the Walmart.

"You know I don't like coffee." I muttered as he talked to the girl behind the counter. It wasn't long before we were out and heading for the car.

"Do you think those two cashiers ever get it on in the middle of the night?" David asked as he sat down on the hood of his car, even in the chill of the October night. I chuckled in response. "No, seriously! I wonder if the guy walks over into the shop and is like 'hey sexy lady'." He put on his best sleazy impression and it succeeded in making me laugh.

We were silent for a bit while he ripped open the Oreos and handed me a cup. I opened the lid to find hot chocolate underneath.

I smiled as I took a sip, but had to spit it out onto the ground, as it burnt my tongue.

"What was that?" He asked, confused.

"Hot." I said shortly and he understood. We sat in silence while I ate Oreos and tried to warm up. We were quite alone in the parking lot, as people rarely left their houses at this time.

I heard a car drive up behind us and I looked around. I saw the familiar face of my brother in his car.

He parked right next to us and got out, only to look over and nearly yell in surprise.

"Maddie?!" He rushed around the car and to me. "I was really getting worried! When I went to pick you up you weren't there! I thought you were kidnapped or something!"

I shook my head and offered him a cupcake to cool his nerves. He took it without question and looked at the two of us. He squinted at David in suspicion.

"What did you do?" Al asked angrily. "And where are your clothes?!" His voice was rising.

"They're in the back seat, dude. Calm down." David muttered. He muttered something under his breath in Spanish afterward. Both Al and returned to our conversation.

"I'm sorry I haven't been home I promise I'll tell you later." I said and Al's expression grew frustrated.

"Why later?" He asked.

"Maybe she still needs to recuperate." David muttered and I lightly punched his arm.

"From what?!" Al got angry again. I simply groaned. Neither of them particularly liked each other, and I had to deal with these fights all the time.

"I fell in the river, okay? I'll tell you more later." I said and Al sighed. He nodded and walked into the store. He was probably going in to pick up a snack before the weekend.

I stopped eating the food and David looked over at me, seemingly concerned.

"What's wrong?" He asked and slid closer on the hood of the car. I shook my head and he sighed. "You know you can tell me anything."

"Yeah, yeah, cheesy cliché lines." I muttered and he laughed a bit.

"Sometimes cheesy cliché lines are the best way to say what you mean." He said and put down his drink. "Now, can you tell me what's wrong?"

I sat in silence again and thought on how to express what I was feeling and thinking. I thought back to the river and I started to shake.

"Maddie?" He asked worriedly. I breathed heavily and looked up at him.

"I thought I was going to die." My voice shook as I said it. I didn't understand why I was so scared of death when it would be the most convenient thing. "That river... it's terrifying.."

He scooted closer and moved the food to put his arm around me.

"Do you need to talk about it?" He asked and I shook my head. He encouraged me a bit and brushed my damp hair off my face. I obliged and took a deep breath to counteract the stutter that I felt coming on.

"I felt at peace in there, in the moments were I was completely submerged and wasn't inhaling water, but.. I felt alone and scared when I passed under the bridge and I knew no one would see me.." My voice was shaking, and by the end, tears were threatening to stream down my face.

"Maddie, you know someone would have seen you if I didn't." He said in a smooth tone.

I sat up straight and pushed his arm off of me. What he'd said had struck a nerve.

"David, people down see me in the halls, I get pushed down in the street multiple times when I walk home, and I have to remind my teachers that I'm there very day." I felt tears running down my face, half out of anger, and half out of pure desperation. "Do you _really_ think someone would have seen me?" I asked. He looked away for a moment and sighed. I took his short break in eye contact as an opportunity to wipe my face clean.

"No. You wold have probably drowned if I hadn't been there." He said and his eyes met mine again. "But aren't you glad I was?"

I bit my lip, wishing I didn't have to answer. I looked at my arm to try to prolong the conversation and found a dark scab, confused. I turned my arm over and found that it stretched the length of my forearm, and was incredibly deep. I didn't remember getting it.

"Maddie?" He asked, realizing I wasn't answering. He looked over the small gap between us and to where I was staring. "What is that?" He muttered and stood up off the car. He was on the other side of me quickly, turning my arm so he could see it better in the street lights above.

"I just saw it, and I have no clue how it got there." I said as he stood there with his eyebrows drawn together.

"It looks like it's a few days old." He said and looked at me. "Did you have this earlier?" I had my coat on almost the entire day, so he wouldn't have seen my arms.

"No? I have no idea how this would have happened. Maybe in the river?" I asked the rhetorical question, even thought I hadn't hit my arms on anything in the water.

"Maybe." He sighed and took his place on the left of me.

We both jumped when the engine of the car next to us started and sped away. I remembered it was Al and thought about how he hadn't even noticed him.

We both glanced at each other and hopped of the hood. I walked around to my side and hopped in. He followed suit and placed the food on my lap.

"Hey." He asked and looked over at me. "You wanna go somewhere?" The grin that was plastered on his face was contagious and I laughed from just looking at him.

"What do you mean?" I asked and he shrugged.

"I dunno, maybe, somewhere dark?" He asked and I simply became confused. "I mean like, far away from city lights and everything."

"It's a half hour drive to get out of the suburbs, David." I said and he groaned.

"I forgot."

Silence was a common thing between us. I decided to start another conversation after a few minutes.

"For a second there it seemed like you were asking me on a date." I chuckled and took a sip of my drink.

Without warning, he rammed the key into the ignition and started the car. I could have sworn he was slightly red, but it was hard to tell in the dark car.

"Were you _actually_ asking me out?" I asked with a slight laugh.

"No." He said a bit too quickly. "You wouldn't have said yes anyway." He added at the end. I grunted and he drove away from the parking lot.

The silence of the car didn't bother me, as I was used to it. My hands found my way to the black bag and to the small medallion on it.

It was made of silver and had flowing engravings in it, and there was small blue gems placed in the centers of a few of the swirls. It was far heavier than it looked, and instead of having a flat outer rim, it was sharpened all the way around, like a small mountain ridge was surrounding it.

I flipped it over in my hands and saw the design was the same, but the gems were a strange iridescent white with a strange purple shine to them, especially when they were caught in the white street lights we were passing.

"The Fall Formal is coming up." David said, obviously uncomfortable with the quiet. I grunted again. "Gilbert is thinking about asking Anastázia to it." I gave a full on snort at that and looked over at him.

"You're kidding, right?" I was incredulous.

"No. I'm not." He said, relaxing in his car seat. "He has no clue she's going out with that Romanian kid."

"In all honesty, I want to see him ask her out." I said and we both laughed.

"I think we should have a party afterward to console him." David said. "I mean, we could have strippers and everything. You like strippers, right?" He asked and glanced at me through the faint reflection in the windshield.

"Age restrictions, David. You seriously need to think these things through." I was mocking him because he was obviously being sarcastic. "And I just _love_ strippers."

"I always knew you were too butch to like guys." He said and we both laughed.

My house approached slowly as we drove down the street. The car came to a halt in front of the driveway and I started collecting my things.

"Be careful, okay?" David said as he reached into the back to grab my wet clothing.

"I'm walking to my front door, I'm not walking several miles in a shady downtown district." I said and watched him smile.

"Message me tomorrow, okay?" He said it like it was a question. "Otherwise, I'll drive down here myself to see if you were kidnapped in the night."

I nodded and leaned over to pick up the last thing and when I looked up, I saw David's face about an inch from mine. I stared at him for a bit before he lifted his hand to my face.

"Be safe." He said in a low tone, not intentionally. I blinked several times, flustered. I was trying to say something, but it felt like my throat had just locked up. As he stared at me I started getting shivers down my spine.

"I should go." I finally managed to say. I quickly grabbed my clothes from his hands and nearly jumped out the car. I closed the door and quickly walked up to the house, unlocking the door and closing it behind me as soon as I got in.

I walked up the stairs quietly and got to my room, where I stared out the window.

David was still sitting there in his car, looking a bit dazed. My window was slightly open to let the cold air in, so I heard his grumbles from outside.

He ran his hands through his hair multiple times and stared at his lap. He looked like he was hitting his own head out of frustration before starting his car and driving off.

I turned around to look at my bed, where Kumajiro was sleeping soundly. It brought a smile to my face, and I really needed one.

I quickly stripped off my clothes for the third time that day, including hockey practice, and slowly put my sleep clothes on, which consisted of an oversized t-shirt, and a pair of boxers.

I tossed the black bag onto the desk, and placed all of the clothing I'd worn in the hamper. The food was placed on a book shelf where the polar bear that resided in my room couldn't get at it.

I found my way into my bed and curled up in the covers, letting myself forget about my troubles and slip away into a blissful realm of sleep.


	9. Many People Simply Love

**A/N: Woo, no reviews. Makes me feel _great_ about my writing prowess.**

**Okay, okay, I'm just kidding. I'll still write, as I can obviously see that you guys are still reading. Seriously. If you're ashamed of reading or something, don't read.**

**I'm really just being sarcastic because I'm in a bad mood and I'm emotionally taxed to hell. And I've been getting to summer homework and bleh.**

**Well, I guess I should start the story. For a change it's David's point of view because we can all see the friend zone forming and teenage boy drama is fun.**

My heart pounded in my throat as I sped away, trying to calm my frustration. I would just have to try again next time, and get rejected again, and again.

I exhaled slowly, and let my death grip on the steering wheel relax. She was just oblivious; I told myself that in a hope that it was right. I practically knew it wasn't, but thinking about it in a calmer manner helped. I turned on the radio and found the jazz network, as they played wonderful music at night.

I slowed down significantly, as I was obviously creating some serious disturbances behind me. My car wound through the residential neighborhood and my mind drifted. I looked at a small, one floor house with a small yard and a deck to match. It reminded me that I would probably have to find my own house as soon as I became an adult.

I stopped at the intersection, even if no one was there, and kept driving. I had driving rules hammered into a skull as soon as I was old enough to be behind a wheel. Again, I came to a stop at another red sign.

I glanced down the street and saw another car a little ways off, so I pulled away and turned left, so I could get to the main road. I glanced into the rear-view mirror and noticed the car didn't stop, but sped up, as if to catch up to me. I looked back to the road, but couldn't avoid looking into the mirror every few seconds.

Before long, he sped up to pass me and I finally noticed it was a police car. For some unknown reason, I felt panicked. I wasn't doing anything wrong to warrant my fear, but it was there.

I watched him pass me and breathed deeply to calm myself. As soon as he was in front of me, he slowed. I tried to pass him, but he seemed to block me.

And then it hit me.

He was pulling me over.

I pulled over to the curve, and as I stopped, I placed my head in my hands, breathing to keep calm. I heard a knock on my window and rolled it down. I reached over to turn down the music and looked up to the police officer.

He was extremely pale and had no facial hair, but had well cut ginger hair framing his face. It was hard not to notice the freckles covering his nose.

"Good evening, officer." I said in my most polite voice. I tried to be quiet, so I wouldn't disrupt the silence of the neighborhood.

"Do you know why I pulled you over?" He asked, obviously expecting me to reply with the right answer. I scanned my memory to try to think of any errors I'd made. I couldn't think of anything, and I even had the tags on the license plate renewed the month before.

"I'm sorry officer, I honestly have no clue why we're talking right now." I wanted to say something sarcastic, but I didn't want to dig a deeper hole to throw myself into.

"How high are you?" He asked abruptly. I was caught off guard by his question.

"Excuse me?"

"You heard me, boy. Now answer me before I cuff you right now." He was obviously angry.

"Sir, I'm completely sober." I said before he scoffed.

"Yeah, because people's eyes dilate like that. And your eyes are incredibly red. " He said and I looked into the mirror. My eyes were perfectly normal, but it was hard to tell, as my eyes were so dark already.

"My eyes are brown. If you actually looked, then you'd see that my eyes are perfectly normal for this time of night. And I'm currently a high school student deprived of sleep, that just got rejected by a potential girlfriend. It's not surprise my eyes are red." I said and watched his expression go into a defensive state. "And on top of that, I'm able to form sentences and pronounce words with fluency and accuracy. How many high people have you seen do that?"

He was scanning for excuses to arrest me and I could see it on his face.

"Get out of the car." He ordered and I sighed, pulling the keys out of the transmission and standing up. He pulled out is flashlight and shined it in my face, making me wince. I watched him grow frustrated as he watched my eyes and found they were in fact brown. He scanned my excessively baggy clothes and looked into the car. "Why is your passenger seat soaked?"

"My friend needed a ride after she got pushed into the river in town." I answered and waited for his next accusation. It came as quickly as I blinked.

"You stole this car, didn't you?" He asked quickly.

"I have the title in the glove compartment."

"Get it, and your license." He muttered and watched me walk around to the passenger side and open the door. I searched through the compartment and brought out the piece of paper.

I showed it to him and pulled out my wallet to show him that I was perfectly able to drive a car. He searched for another reason to arrest me, and I started to grow frustrated.

"We have a curfew in these parts." He said as I leaned onto the car.

"The curfew applies to people out of cars and walking around the streets. It's midnight for people over 16, and 22:00 for people under that age. As you can see from my license, I'm sixteen, and as you can tell from the previously running _car_ I wasn't walking around the streets." I said quickly.

"Don't talk back to me!" is voice was louder than before. I groaned and rolled my head back, trying to stay calm. "What did I say, boy?!"

"Officer, you are honestly abusing your power under the law. I was not speeding, I have all my tags up to date, I can legally drive this car, and I'm not under the influence." I said in a smooth tone that I didn't expect to come out of my mouth. From his face, he hadn't expected it either.

"You didn't come to a complete stop at that intersection!"

"You know as well as I that I did, and if you don't believe your own eyes, I know for a fact that you have a camera on your dash. If you'd like to see my lack of traffic violations, lets go and watch it." I said, finally shutting him up. He looked around for a bit before reaching to his belt. He started speaking a sort series of gibberish before saying: "My location is the intersection of Robinson Avenue and Forest Street. I'm requesting backup for an unruly teenager refusing arrest."

I nearly punched him.

My fingernails dug into my palms and I exhaled through my nose loudly. I imagined that I was at home sitting at the computer and listening to music before I opened my eyes to the pale man.

Not even ten minutes needed to pass before another cop car came down the road with his siren on. I wanted to hide in my car form how much of a disturbance it was.

He pulled to the curb and stood up out of his car. I took a swig of the coffee I had in the car since I took Maddie to the store.

"What seems to be the problem?" The new police officer asked. He was a tall African American man, who obviously was extremely bored.

"This boy was insulting me when I was simply checking if he was lost, because he was driving extremely slowly."

My coffee splattered onto the ground when I crushed the cup in my hand. It was all I could do to stop myself from lashing out. I unclenched my fist and let the cup fall to the ground. I looked up and saw the new police man stare confusedly, while the ginger man swallowed hard.

"Sir, I have been nothing but respectful to this man. He has falsely accused me of driving under the influence of drugs, reckless driving, being out past curfew, and stealing this car. He also started questioning me without plausible reasons." I said and watched the two of them stare at each other.

After a few moments the new police officer looked at me and nodded.

"You can head home, son." The man said and I nodded back. I hopped in the car and started it, then turning the radio up and shooting a spiteful glace at the ginger man before pulling away.

As soon as I got a reasonable distance from the two cops, I punched the passenger seat out of pure frustration. I forced my hand down multiple times before returning my hand to the steering wheel.

I was soon driving along the busier streets of the town, back to my house across the bridge. It was a long drive with nothing to accompany my thoughts other than the music. The only things I was able to think were thoughts about Maddie, and the farm.

"How the hell am I supposed to get her to like me." I muttered to myself. Vocalizing my thoughts, even if no one listened, was always comforting. "I don't have money, and I don't have the courage to just buck it up and ask." My hand motions followed what I was saying, even if I still had a hand on the wheel. "I couldn't ask anyone for money, and everyone would laugh at me if I asked for help anyway."

I looked across the intersection I had stopped at and saw another driver staring as me as if I was crazy. I decided that I needed to shut my mouth until I got home.

Driving across the bridge was a serene moment, as the sky was clear the the moon was out. I could only think back to what Maddie described and shudder.

The long driveway to my house came into view, as the streets thinned out and no one accompanied me on the road.

Before I knew it, I was stepping out of my car and up to the front doors. It was unlocked from when I dropped off my little sister, and it didn't even creak as I stepped inside.

I should have been home at ten, and that was when I dropped off my sister, but it was almost an hour later.

I practically crawled up the stairs, past my parents' and brother's rooms, and slipped into my bed silently. I didn't even bother to take off me shoes before I covered myself in blankets and slept.

**ϪϪϪTIMESKIP+MADDIE'S POVϪϪϪ**

I opened my eyes to an abrupt and insentient knocking on my door.

"No one's home!" I tried to say in my groggy half-asleep talk. It probably came out as a series of unintelligible grunts. I heard the door burst open and threw a pillow at the person walking in the room. I heard Kumajiro on the floor trying to get them to play.

"Maddie, get up. Someone found your bags." The person talking was easily distinguished as Al. I looked up at him with fuzzy and bleary eyes and confirmed my suspicion of him. He was holding Kumajiro in his arms and a phone.

I grabbed the phone out of his hands and rolled over. He laid my polar bear cub on my stomach and I spoke into the phone.

"Hello?" I asked groggily.

"Hey! Maddie, I saw your bags outside the school and thought you lost them or forgot them or something." I heard Matt's loud and energetic voice on the other end. "I was wondering when I could drop them off for you."

"Um, today, I guess. Whatever time is good for you." I said as I rubbed my eyes. I glanced over and saw Alfred trying to rummage through my desk drawers. I picked up a shoe from right below my bed and tossed it at him, hitting him in the shoulder blades. He turned around, alarmed, and I simply shook my head.

"Okay, I'll probably be around by 13:30." He said and I grunted before hanging up.

"What was that for?!" Al asked, slightly angry.

"No one looks through my stuff. I'll give Kuma his medicine on my own." I said and tossed him the phone. He caught it and walked out quickly before shutting the door behind him.

I felt bad for throwing things at him and wanted to ay sorry, but he was gone already. I swung my legs off the bed and stood up, reaching into the drawer that held both of our medicines.

I grabbed the two bottles and walked back to the bed. I opened my own and swallowed the two pills dry, before opening his bottle.

"Open up." I said and tapped his nose. He did so and I slipped him his medicine. They helped his heart beat more efficiently, and mine were simply anti-depressants, which barely even worked.

I shivered from the cold breeze coming in through the window and turned to the closet, were I pulled out a bra that was hanging on the rack, and a pair of grey thigh high knit socks. I preferred them over pants or tights, because pants were too constricting to my hips. I could also slide on the wood floor of the house.

They also concealed my scars.

I hopped a bit, trying to put on a different pair of underwear for the day, and tripped over my own feet in the process. I pulled them on as I was sitting, followed by my socks.

I opened the door and Kumajiro practically jumped down the stairs, and I followed him, closing the door behind me.

As I reached the downstairs I glanced at the news that was playing on TV, waiting for the small bar on the bottom to scroll into the forecast. It was in the 20's outside, which made me smile.

"Maddie, don't go outside without pants." Al said from the couch as he looked over at me and my pet.

"We have a tall fence, and I'll even put a coat on." I said, a little bit dryly. It sounded as if I didn't want to exist, when I was actually feeling strangely bouncy that morning, despite the abrupt awakening. "You don't even have pants on." I observed before he chuckled.

"Are you going to have him 'hunt'?" Alfred asked. He was referring to when I wrapped a piece of red meat in pork skin and tied it to a string before letting Kumajiro chase it around the small, crude pool in the back.

"Well, it's perfectly cold outside, and the pool is frozen out back, right?" I asked and watched him nod. His face contorted as he was sickened by the morbid exercise my bear got.

"Please don't." He said and I chuckled a bit. His cat was de-clawed and stayed in his room at all times, so the bloody fun my pet got was a little too gruesome for him.

I opened the glass door to the porch and let the white ball of fluff bound out onto the frozen dirt. He got to the back corner, where a ditch in the ground held a tarp, which in turn held a two and a half foot deep pool of frozen over water.

He pounded his front paws on the ice, in an attempt to break it, most likely to get to the red ball in the bottom, which was his favorite thing to play with.

I closed the door before heading into the kitchen to retrieve a hunk of meat from the back of the fridge, which was already prepared. I placed it on a cutting board to puncture a hole in it with a knife, feeling the fleeting thoughts about placing those same holes in my own body run through my head.

I shook them away as I rummaged to find the smooth ended hook to put the meat on. I was soon outside, dangling the meat around, watching the cub follow it intently before he finally mauled it.

While he was eating the meat in a playful way, I searched the yard for a shovel. My shoes kept slipping on my feet, but it didn't matter. The shovel had somehow ended up in between the tree and the fence.

When I got back to the pool, Kumajiro was nearly done with his food. I waited until he wanted to get back on the ice. He tried to dig at the ice with no claws, and I only moved him out of the way gently, so I could smash the ice.

As soon at it was broken up, he jumped in and dove the short ways to his ball. I crouched next to the pond like thing and tossed the ball around for him to play with. This was his favorite thing to do, and I often left him outside alone, because I knew he wouldn't get out of the backyard, and was perfectly comfortable in the late fall frost.

"Madelyn!" I heard a voice say from the door. I turned around to see Mom, leaning out in the cold. "Why aren't you wearing pants?" She asked, confused.

"I'm not cold." I said back, and had to repeat it another two times for her to hear. "What did you want?" I asked as I jogged up.

"Someone sent you a package." She said, and I simply stared. I never got packages, and when I did, they were actually for Al.

I glance back at Kumajiro to see where he was, and quickly walked to the front door. When I got there, I looked out at the lazy looking teen.

"Are you, uh.." He paused while glancing down at the paper. "Madelyn Williams?" He asked. I nodded so he would hand me the electronic pad to sign. I did so and found a long box pushed into my hands.

I turned to look at the two members of my family. My mother had obviously just gotten home.

"What is it?" Al asked, acting like an oversensitive puppy.

"It's in a flower box. And it has the local florist's logo on it, so my best guess is that someone has a secret admirer." My mom said before walking into the living room. She came back with a box cutter and led us both to the kitchen.

I opened the tape up, having small flashbacks of using that same box cutter to mangle my thighs. That was before I acquired my own razors.

I pulled out a bouquet of purple lilacs and stared deeper in the box. It had a small slip of paper at the bottom. My mom took the flowers out of my hand so I could reach in and unfold the purple slip of paper.

"_Many people love you, especially me."_ It read.

I looked up a few times, trying to comprehend the note. Al leaned over to read it and had the same reaction as me.

"What?" I said blankly as I heard my mom snip the ends of the stems. She placed them in a vase.

"Do you want them in your room?" She asked and quickly realized the answer. It was too cold in my room for anything but Kumajiro and myself to live. She placed it on the side table in the living room.

I quickly pushed the piece of paper into my pocket so I wouldn't have to deal with my mother nosing in on it.

Before long, I was back outside, playing in the freezing water. I tried to enjoy playing with my pet, but the note just kept gnawing at my brain.

"Many people love you, ha. They have no idea who they're talking to." I muttered and saw Kumajiro stare at me, as if he was sad at the comment I made.

**A/N2: So, I'll be heading to school on the 22nd if anyone cares. I might be late on my chapters, but always check on Sundays, I guess.**


	10. This is just a notice

Guys. I need another week. I guess this is kinda a letter to all of the people that care, but currently, I can't write. It's not writer's block, it's mostly emotional things.

I honestly just want to break down crying and I've just had a horrendously devastating month. I really wish I could write, but I just can't. I'm sorry for addressing you in this way, and postponing what I should do, but I simply can't.

I don't feel comfortable going into specifics with a mass audience, for reasons. If you actually want to help or just know what's going on, I guess you could private message me, but I'll let you do whatever you want with this information.

Anyway, this is a notice saying there won't be a chapter this Sunday, and maybe not even in two weeks. But I will still be trying to write one.

I'm not trying to make you message me, or get more people to favorite this or anything. I'm just trying to explain my situation and why I'm not updating.

Thank you for reading this, and I will see you in a week or two.


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